Climate-change panic may have breathed new life into the disaster-movie genre, but even the most paranoid viewer will remain unflustered for these 110 minutes.
Starring Robert Carlyle as a marine engineer and Tom Courtenay in the dual role of his estranged dad and the requisite maverick scientist, Flood tells of a freak 50-foot CG wave heading straight for central London as bureaucrats bicker and make angry calls to the Met Office. It somehow manages to be hysterical without drama, bleak without emotion and laborious without making a single point.
The floods decimate the rest of the UK in the opening minutes, and it’s assumed we’ll care only for the fate of Londoners, Carlyle, his dad, his ex-wife and a handful of equally undeveloped and unlovable characters. We don’t.