Christmas Nuggets

Shooting stars, sultry secretaries and schlock horror fun

by Willow Green |
Published on

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Net, not a creature was stirring, well, nothing even remotely resembling news anyway. Still, we don't want you utterly devoid of information on this brisk December morning so here's what little information we could cobble together for your edification and amusement. Blame It On The Boogeyman Fans of bog standard horror fare can dance a merry jig this morning and feast their gore-hungry eyes on the trailer for Stephen T Kay's Boogeyman. It's no more original than a thousand other such films but there are scary children in it - which always gives us the wiggins. See it here. Lock And Load Husky-voiced beauty Scarlett Johansson is not a woman with whom to mess at the moment. In training for M (now pushed back to the tail end of next year), she of the semi-transparent pink pants is being taught the finer points of warfare and maiming with heavy assault weaponry, which is always nice at Christmas. "I'm doing weapons training for it. Just pulling the trigger is easy enough, but when you're loading your magazine and you have a machine gun and a handgun and a shotgun, and you're trying to figure out how to use them all..." Yes we can see how that might be confusing... Miss Johanssen, ma'am. A Whole New World Well, a whole new site anyway. Terence Malick's impending story of the seventeenth century conflict between Brits and Native Americans now has its own official site with details on the film, photos and, of course, the trailer. The film stars Colin Farrell as explorer John Smith, who encounters legendary Indian hottie Pocahontas during the founding of the Jamestown settlement in 1607. The film looks very impressive and we can't wait to see it, so check out the site here. Uma For Ulla Rumours abound that Uma Thurman is set to replace Nicole Kidman in Mel Brooks' production of The Producers. Our Nic dropped out recently due to conflicts with Eucalyptus, leaving the role of the buxom Swedish secretary up for grabs. We've absolutely no evidence of the fact but, according to the New York Post, Uma's stepped in to take on the part. Confirmation or denial will doubtless follow in the new year but here's hoping it's true. Uma would almost certainly do a sterling job of bringing Ulla to the screen. And that, we're sorry to say, is about it. So until we return, refreshed and alert after plenty of Christmas cheer and far too much chocolate on January 6, this is Empire Online, last survivor of the Nostromo, signing off. Merry Christmas one and all.

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