Cruise Targets Internet Rumour-Mongers

As surprised as people were to hear a recent press release that Tom Cruise would be holding a series of educational lectures on the evils of psychiatry, they weren't as surprised as the Cruiser himself. Tom's publicist has broadly denounced the release, which stated Cruise would hold court on such subjects as 'How Psychiatry Invented Schizophrenia, and What Scientologists Can Do About It' and 'Handling Sexual Dis-Orientation: Out of the Closet and into the Auditing Room.' Cruise has been vocal in his condemnation of the profession in the past so people were quick to believe the news, which turns out to be a work of utter fiction. "It's totally phony. I never issued that release. Tom is not giving any lectures," said Cruise's lawyer - a man with whom whoever did send it will soon become acquainted with.