Register  |   Log In  |  
Sign up to our weekly newsletter    
Empire Magazine and iPad
Follow Me on Pinterest YouTube Tumblr Viber
Trending On Empire
The Big 2015 Movie Preview
The 50 Best Films Of 2014
Review Of The Year 2014
Subscribe to Empire!
Save up to 63%
Want To Be An Empire Journalist?
We're looking for reporters for the LFF
Unmissable 5 Stars
Excellent 4 Stars
Good 3 Stars
Poor 2 Stars
Tragic 1 Star

Click poster to enlarge
More posters to select

Stephen Dorff
Jaime Murray
Sean Pertwee
Jamie Foreman.
Kit Ryan.
Running Time
95 minutes

4 Star Empire Rating
2 Star Empire Rating
2 Star Empire Rating
Intern, The
3 Star Empire Rating
Nightmare, The
3 Star Empire Rating

5 Star Empire Rating
Man With A Movie Camera
5 Star Empire Rating
Salt Of The Earth, The
5 Star Empire Rating
Song Of The Sea
5 Star Empire Rating
Look Of Silence, The
5 Star Empire Rating

Splat's entertainment...

submit to reddit

During a heist in Russia, a thief (Stephen Dorff) finds himself dealing with serial killers, insane hostages, double-crossing psycho Russian hardmen and the very real possibility of a very, very nasty death

The horror comedy is clearly the splat du jour, although aficionados will find nothing new in this debut outing from Kit Ryan.

Dispatched to Moscow by mobster Sean Pertwee to steal Ivan The Terrible's crucifix, Stephen Dorff finds himself trapped in a tenement with his incompetent sidekicks and a motley crew of hostages as they're picked off by a maniacal descendant of Russia's first tsar.

The emphasis is more on knockabout schlock than genuine terror and, consequently, the decapitations, impalings and dissectings have more of a guffaw than a grotesque factor. But the action rattles along (albeit sometimes contrivedly and incoherently) and Jamie Foreman, Geoff Bell and Bronagh Gallagher feast on the scenery to amusing effect opposite the deadpan Dorff and love interest, Jaime Murray. Hugely derivative, but highly entertaining.

Hugely derivative, but highly entertaining.

Reviewed by Patrick Peters

Write Your Review
To write your review please login or register.

Your Reviews

Average user rating for Botched
Empire Star Rating

Stupidly Funny

Watched this film on the Horror channel a few months ago with my boyfriend and was pleasantly surprised. It's full of Cliches but that does not matter because it's so stupidly funny that you wont care after a while. Botched is a film that doesn't take itself seriously, It is one those films that you either like or you don't, but for me it definitely tickled my funny bone. ... More

Empire User Rating

Posted by jrose156 at 14:34, 22 December 2014 | Report This Post

Empire Meets Ridley Scott
The great director on The Martian, Blade Runner 2 and the Prometheus sequels

Jessica Chastain On The Martian
On becoming an astronaut and rescuing Matt Damon AGAIN

My Movie Life: Justin Kurzel
The Macbeth director on how Rocky changed his life and the worst ever date movie

Life On Mars: Trips To The Red Planet
A dozen of cinema's Martian misadventures

Hallowed Ground: Folk Horror In British Film
Ten tales from our island's dark past

All Hail Macbeth! The Scottish Play On Film
By the pricking of our thumbs, ten adaptations this way come(s)

10 Star Wars: The Force Awakens Toys You’ll Want To Own
Falcon quad copter? BB-8 Sphero? We’re already asking for pay raises…

Subscribe to Empire magazine
Empire print magazine

Delivered to your door – with exclusive subscriber only covers each month! Save money today and

Subscribe now!

Subscribe to Empire iPad edition
Empire digital magazine

Exclusive and enhanced content – get instant access via your iPad or Android device! Save money today and

Subscribe now!

Subscribe now and save up to 63%
Print, Digital & Package options available Subscribe today!
Empire's Film Studies 101 Series
Everything you ever wanted to know about filmmaking but were afraid to ask...
The Empire Digital Edition
With exclusive extras, interactive features, trailers and much more! Download now
Home  |  News  |  Blogs  |  Reviews  |  Future Films  |  Features  |  Interviews  |  Images  |  Competitions  |  Forum  |  Digital Edition  |  Podcast  |  Magazine Contact Us  |  Empire FAQ  |  Subscribe To Empire  |  Register
© Bauer Consumer Media Ltd  |  Legal Info  |  Editorial Complaints  |  Privacy Policy  |  Bauer Entertainment Network
Bauer Consumer Media Ltd (company number 01176085 and registered address 1 Lincoln Court, Lincoln Road, Peterborough, England PE1 2RF)