Without A Paddle

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Three friends embark on a riverboat trip-cum-treasure hunt.


Hollywood’s diabolical matchmaker regularly produces films of the form X meets Y, but surely a couple have never been so obviously incompatible as this grim amalgam of Deliverance and Stand By Me.

Three friends embark on a riverboat trip-cum-treasure hunt; what ensues is an exercise in unimaginative bad taste (at one point, the characters spend five minutes flinging bags of human excrement at each other — it’s an appropriate metaphor).

The trio are charmless and the screenplay’s idiocy seasoned with a toxic blend of schmaltz and boorishness, the only meniscus of pleasure being the anticipation of all three being subjected to a Deliverance-style violent anal indignity. In a movie as disappointing as this, it should come as no surprise that this moment never arrives.