New York Minute Review

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The Ryan twins journey to New York - swotty Jane to give a big speech for a scholarship, rebel Roxy to crash a video shoot. But they get kidnapped and embroiled with criminals and cute boys while tracked by Roxy's dogged truant officer…


The Olsen twins, now 18, have been a TV phenomenon since they were nine months old. They front a merchandising empire of home videos, apparel and 'lifestyle items', which we take to mean lunch boxes and all things girlie. More recently, the causes and consequences of Mary-Kate's anorexia have sent the US tabloids into a feeding frenzy. Sadly, anyone hoping for better news has come to the wrong place.

Jane (Ashley, we think) is the 'good', bossy one. Roxy (Mary-Kate, we think) is the 'bad', irresponsible one. Separately the characters are annoying; together it's unnervingly like watching one actress playing twins. Has anyone ever seen the twins for real, or are they the creation of a special effects conspiracy?

While foiling a gang whose stolen chip they unknowingly possess, the siblings tear through Manhattan, losing their clothes and finding boyfriends (we're not sure which of them is which, either). We wouldn't really mind but for an excruciating Harlem stop in which jolly black women spring to the chickies' rescue with a 'makeover' involving dancing and donning Afro wigs. Shudder.

Nine year-olds might be moderately entertained, but the film's dismal performance in the US hints legions of Olsen devotees have moved on.