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RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 6:28:59 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.

(in reply to Rebenectomy)
Post #: 121
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 7:03:32 PM   
elab49


Posts: 54616
Joined: 1/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.


Asking to talk to someone or do something with them outside of work isn't what Reb asked though - esp as it's clear that can be regularly misconstrued as something it isn't. People meet outside of work all the time as friends.

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Deviation] LIKE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS TOO. IT MADE ME LAUGH A LOT AND THOUGHT IT WAS WITTY. ALSO I FEEL SLOWLY DYING INSIDE. I KEEP AGREEING WITH ELAB.


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(in reply to Ghidorah)
Post #: 122
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 7:17:24 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49


quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.


Asking to talk to someone or do something with them outside of work isn't what Reb asked though - esp as it's clear that can be regularly misconstrued as something it isn't. People meet outside of work all the time as friends.


Yes but in a reluctant voice? End of the day the friendship is over and I need to focus on other things instead of what ifs.

(in reply to elab49)
Post #: 123
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 7:18:07 PM   
paul_ie86


Posts: 11422
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: Chelsea Hotel #2

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.


Reb asked if your friend has clearly said that she wanted to be more than friends. You haven't answered that question.


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Post #: 124
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 7:20:21 PM   
elab49


Posts: 54616
Joined: 1/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49


quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.


Asking to talk to someone or do something with them outside of work isn't what Reb asked though - esp as it's clear that can be regularly misconstrued as something it isn't. People meet outside of work all the time as friends.


Yes but in a reluctant voice? End of the day the friendship is over and I need to focus on other things instead of what ifs.


That doesn't really make sense - she asked to talk to you outside of work, but didn't really want to do it?

And as Paul says - Reb asked a pretty clear question.

_____________________________

Lips Together and Blow - blogtasticness and Glasgow Film Festival GFF13!

quote:

ORIGINAL: Deviation] LIKE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS TOO. IT MADE ME LAUGH A LOT AND THOUGHT IT WAS WITTY. ALSO I FEEL SLOWLY DYING INSIDE. I KEEP AGREEING WITH ELAB.


Annual Poll 2013 - All Lists Welcome

(in reply to Ghidorah)
Post #: 125
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 7:44:17 PM   
matty_b


Posts: 14579
Joined: 19/10/2005
From: Outpost 31 calling McMurtle.
I hope to god this woman doesn't find this forum.




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(in reply to elab49)
Post #: 126
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 7:59:10 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49


quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49


quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.


Asking to talk to someone or do something with them outside of work isn't what Reb asked though - esp as it's clear that can be regularly misconstrued as something it isn't. People meet outside of work all the time as friends.


Yes but in a reluctant voice? End of the day the friendship is over and I need to focus on other things instead of what ifs.


That doesn't really make sense - she asked to talk to you outside of work, but didn't really want to do it?

And as Paul says - Reb asked a pretty clear question.



It means she want to take things further but at the sametime she is commited to her boyfriend.

Other than that there is NO clear verbal admittance.

(in reply to elab49)
Post #: 127
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 8:11:05 PM   
elab49


Posts: 54616
Joined: 1/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49


quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49


quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebenectomy

Just to clarify Ghidorah, has there actually been a clear verbal admittance from this girl that she is attracted to you and wanted more than friendship, like in the case of Valanya?


Yes.

She reluctantly asked me if I wanted to spend time with her outside of work. I changed the subject because I didn't know what her boyfriend was liked at the time. I also didn't want to put our friendship into that situation.


Asking to talk to someone or do something with them outside of work isn't what Reb asked though - esp as it's clear that can be regularly misconstrued as something it isn't. People meet outside of work all the time as friends.


Yes but in a reluctant voice? End of the day the friendship is over and I need to focus on other things instead of what ifs.


That doesn't really make sense - she asked to talk to you outside of work, but didn't really want to do it?

And as Paul says - Reb asked a pretty clear question.



It means she want to take things further but at the sametime she is commited to her boyfriend.

Other than that there is NO clear verbal admittance.


Or it's a meaning you're putting on to it with no real basis to do so because there's a clear confusion between a shoulder to cry on and anything more than that. A woman in my work goes on about her relationship all the time - I don't think that means she's making advances to me.

If you're getting to the stage where you're acknowledging there has never been any overt move to a non-friend relationship on her part - isn't it about time you took the advice you've been getting for the 6 months you've been talking about this on here and move past it?


_____________________________

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Deviation] LIKE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS TOO. IT MADE ME LAUGH A LOT AND THOUGHT IT WAS WITTY. ALSO I FEEL SLOWLY DYING INSIDE. I KEEP AGREEING WITH ELAB.


Annual Poll 2013 - All Lists Welcome

(in reply to Ghidorah)
Post #: 128
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 8:25:54 PM   
Professor Moriarty

 

Posts: 10462
Joined: 6/10/2005
From: the waters of Casablanca
quote:

A woman in my work goes on about her relationship all the time - I don't think that means she's making advances to me.


My boss keeps asking me to come into his office, should I be worried . In better news, the office administrator often says "good morning" to me, in that way that may sound like the same way she says it to everyone, but my ears can tell its a bit special ;-)

(in reply to elab49)
Post #: 129
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 8:41:41 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005
I think it's obivious I want to move on because I'm avioding the questions, hardly going into detail and all because I want closure.

I would like to add the reason it took this long to get to this stage is one I didn't know exactly what going on. Afterall she wasn't being honest to me. Second when I attempted to aviod her, she wouldn't accept the message and kept on trying to talk to me. I could easily give examples but I'm not. End of the day the friendship is over and I'm not going allow her in my life again.

(in reply to elab49)
Post #: 130
RE: Emotional Affairs - 8/7/2013 8:43:18 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005
quote:

ORIGINAL: Professor Moriarty

quote:

A woman in my work goes on about her relationship all the time - I don't think that means she's making advances to me.


My boss keeps asking me to come into his office, should I be worried . In better news, the office administrator often says "good morning" to me, in that way that may sound like the same way she says it to everyone, but my ears can tell its a bit special ;-)



I had a manager who had itchy balls when he talked to me. Should i still give a shit?

< Message edited by Ghidorah -- 8/7/2013 9:01:44 PM >

(in reply to Professor Moriarty)
Post #: 131
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 8:41:24 AM   
Chief


Posts: 7778
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: Banshee
Women tell me to fuck off all the time but I think they're saying it reluctantly, are they in love with me?

(in reply to Ghidorah)
Post #: 132
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 11:29:03 AM   
Sumintelligentguy


Posts: 3743
Joined: 31/8/2006
I can't believe this thread is still active.

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(in reply to Chief)
Post #: 133
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 3:05:45 PM   
Olaf


Posts: 23709
Joined: 26/2/2007
From: 41N 93W

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sumintelligentguy

I can't believe this thread is still active.


I like to think we all learned something though, which is a plus. Mainly that making up new terminology for 'she likes you as a friend' is a good way to sell self-help books.

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Post #: 134
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 8:10:06 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chief

Women tell me to fuck off all the time but I think they're saying it reluctantly, are they in love with me?



Are these women the same one you locked up in your basement?

(in reply to Chief)
Post #: 135
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 8:17:18 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Olaf


quote:

ORIGINAL: Sumintelligentguy

I can't believe this thread is still active.


I like to think we all learned something though, which is a plus. Mainly that making up new terminology for 'she likes you as a friend' is a good way to sell self-help books.



Remember folks there is nothing wrong with being harrassed by a woman who wants to be good friends. Except she has a boyfriend and doesn't want the friendship to take place outside of work. It all perfectly normal behaviour.

(in reply to Olaf)
Post #: 136
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 8:26:44 PM   
paul_ie86


Posts: 11422
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: Chelsea Hotel #2
That doesn't mean she wants a physical relationship with you. It might just mean she's in an unhealthy relationship with a jealous boyfriend.

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Post #: 137
RE: Emotional Affairs - 9/7/2013 8:29:23 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: paul_ie86

That doesn't mean she wants a physical relationship with you. It might just mean she's in an unhealthy relationship with a jealous boyfriend.


Correct.

(in reply to paul_ie86)
Post #: 138
RE: Emotional Affairs - 10/7/2013 8:39:13 AM   
Chief


Posts: 7778
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: Banshee

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ghidorah


quote:

ORIGINAL: Chief

Women tell me to fuck off all the time but I think they're saying it reluctantly, are they in love with me?



Are these women the same one you locked up in your basement?


Yes. I like to call it "emotionally married".

(in reply to Ghidorah)
Post #: 139
RE: Emotional Affairs - 11/7/2013 10:20:45 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005
quote:

ORIGINAL: paul_ie86

That doesn't mean she wants a physical relationship with you. It might just mean she's in an unhealthy relationship with a jealous boyfriend.



I'm going into greater detail because I had been reading up a lot on the subject. There is a great forum which members can talk about their experiences in affairs. It's very interesting and a lot of it reflex my personal experience. Sadly that forum is dominated by women believing their affair partners aka married men loves them and he will leave his family for her. In a way it could be compared to crack addict forum, where the addicts talk about all class A drugs should be made legal.
In a way it's rather scary because a lot of these women are being taken to a ride and they aren't aware of it. They believe they are going to be risk away when actual fact the cheater is just using them. There are sensible topics talking about their experiences. Talking about they are being used and how the cheaters never actually cared for them. Then there are others trying to restore friendships and having great difficulties. Others there are genuine feelings for each other. However like said that forum is now dominated by women talking about how great being used in an affair. No it not. I have to back track pages in dozens to find sensible sods.

End of the day the friend was missing something in her relationship and used me to fill in the viod. I think the sad fact is she could of done it by creating a platonic friendship instead she was controlling me. Playing down her boyfriend role in her life and let me into hers. However she kicks me out when her boyfriend is present. So end of the day she used me, I need to accept it and moved on. The only problem she doesn't know I had seen her twitter acount and know she is lying to me. She had spoken to me a few time since my discovery day. It also need to look at the other alternative she maybe using her boyfriend. Nasty situation to deal with.

< Message edited by Ghidorah -- 11/7/2013 10:25:51 PM >

(in reply to paul_ie86)
Post #: 140
RE: Emotional Affairs - 12/7/2013 1:06:14 PM   
paul_ie86


Posts: 11422
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: Chelsea Hotel #2
I give up.

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Post #: 141
RE: Emotional Affairs - 12/7/2013 9:44:59 PM   
Ghidorah

 

Posts: 2930
Joined: 6/10/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: paul_ie86

I give up.


Welcome to the club.

(in reply to paul_ie86)
Post #: 142
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