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Star Wars Characters Who DON’T Deserve Their Own Spin-Off

 
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Star Wars Characters Who DON’T Deserve Their Own ... - 19/2/2013 9:38:05 AM   
Empire Admin

 

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Post #: 1
- 19/2/2013 9:38:05 AM   
rossabroad

 

Posts: 22
Joined: 29/3/2006
What an incredible article you've written

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RE: - 19/2/2013 9:47:15 AM   
Jezzman

 

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Joined: 26/10/2007
Slow news day?!


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Post #: 3
Rancor keeper - 19/2/2013 10:37:40 AM   
Norsedwarf

 

Posts: 10
Joined: 26/11/2007
You do realise the rancor keeper was played by the great Shakespearean actor Paul Brooke (although known to most these days from Bridget Jones Diary). Just sayin'

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Post #: 4
Erm... - 19/2/2013 10:41:59 AM   
jojoruck

 

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/10/2010
Jar Jar... Yousa remember himsa?

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Long Time Reader, First Time Poster! - 19/2/2013 10:43:34 AM   
DextersLab

 

Posts: 16
Joined: 19/2/2013
This really is a rubbish article eh?!

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Long Time Reader, First Time Poster! - 19/2/2013 10:51:00 AM   
DextersLab

 

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Joined: 19/2/2013
This really is a rubbish article eh?!

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- 19/2/2013 11:08:51 AM   
tejo

 

Posts: 9
Joined: 7/10/2005
It’s more an article I’d expect from TotalFilm.

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Post #: 8
What you talking about!? - 19/2/2013 12:35:22 PM   
Rumpledink

 

Posts: 63
Joined: 31/8/2006
I'd so watch Mouse Droid and Rancor Keeper!

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Post #: 9
- 19/2/2013 2:21:06 PM   
Overmind


Posts: 440
Joined: 16/1/2008
From: Hyperspace
The Malakili story would make a nice short though..

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Post #: 10
The hate is swelling in you now... - 19/2/2013 4:49:32 PM   
MrkyMrk

 

Posts: 31
Joined: 6/1/2006
So many rants posted about these fun little time wasters.

Empire scribes - don't let the haters grind you down.

I do wish more folks would heed Thumper...
"If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all"

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Post #: 11
- 19/2/2013 7:40:08 PM   
steveg66


Posts: 417
Joined: 5/9/2006
From: harlow
How about the Sarlacc? At least it's digestive system could justify a trilogy unlike The Hobbit.


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Post #: 12
JAR JAR BINKS - 19/2/2013 8:25:29 PM   
Heman

 

Posts: 8
Joined: 24/5/2007
From: Dublin
How does Jar Jar not populate the entire list???

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Post #: 13
- 20/2/2013 1:04:49 AM   
apocalypso

 

Posts: 10
Joined: 28/5/2012
Number 9 reminded me of this:

http://trashcompactor.tumblr.com/post/26145243424/daw-someone-loves-even-you-rancor

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Post #: 14
- 20/2/2013 4:35:29 AM   
NeoBrowser

 

Posts: 176
Joined: 1/5/2012
I would add Chewbacca to this list....

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Post #: 15
RE: - 20/2/2013 1:18:20 PM   
rogerebert

 

Posts: 9
Joined: 14/12/2012

quote:

ORIGINAL: tejo

Its more an article Id expect from TotalFilm.



quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumpledink

I'd so watch Mouse Droid and Rancor Keeper!


Completely agree with both of these.

(in reply to tejo)
Post #: 16
Lighten up, you don't have to read it - 20/2/2013 4:52:39 PM   
jodybriggs

 

Posts: 21
Joined: 10/8/2009
That's a fair amount of pissed off messages for a bit of throw away fun, it passed a few mins in work for me and gave me a smirk or two so keep up the random bits and bobs Empire.

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Post #: 17
- 21/2/2013 12:46:20 PM   
theelusiveshaun

 

Posts: 1
Joined: 25/12/2012
I can see it now. Kevin James is...

Cedric Cooper: Stormtrooper

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Post #: 18
THEY ALL DESERVE TO BE MADE INTO SHORTS! - 24/2/2013 5:08:01 AM   
Helyx Helyx


Posts: 4
Joined: 12/2/2007
From: Amsterdam, The Netherlands, Europe
I think the utter demise of said characters in short films - making one good Star Wars promo for Disney's HANDS OFF approach would restore faith in the franchise. As long as incredibly gifted writers, who could direct such comedy material in the way that Marvel Studios restored the whole idea of short films as a promo could be incredibly enjoyable to watch. I personally would like to see the utter demise of all of these characters, in Star Wars historically accurate time lines. Who would not want to see Darth Vader step on the tiny robot who is about to deliver the most important message ever to the Federation, leading Darth Vader into more heavy labored breathing anger (leading to more deaths of other side characters); mutant killer baby Ewok caused by the Federation Industrial Complex - wiping out the cannibalistic Ewoks into extinction. Get the picture? If not, then there is no Operation funny bones in the Galaxy.

Just make sure Joss Whedon gets to do one. I am sure there would be no problem finding Directors who are encumbered with their career schedules, delight in being selected to do a Star Wars promo short demises of all characters listed (and a few others I could add to the list).

These gifts of joy at their terrible tragedy would make great pre-new Star War teaser releases; why not an IMAX one as well. As long as George Lucas realizes that we are laughing with him, and not at him for these, um characters that sometimes sidelined the story finally get their comeuppance/death/several deaths at once - would add to the whole attraction of a new Star Wars. Just make sure it's great Directors who do this, or the whole project will kill off the other wondrous possibilities of these final cut-off fates of woe. It could lead to better side characters if they knew that their end could come before they even get a chance to utter one word!

< Message edited by Helyx Helyx -- 24/2/2013 5:21:10 AM >

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