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Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 8:59:20 AM

Posts: 3506
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: two counties east of home

Hi everyone,

I need some advice! Many of you don't know me but I am part of the furniture. For those that do know me (and some of you know me very well), please don't mention this on Facebook or Twitter.

I am in a sticky situation at work and believe I will be fired in the relatively near future. I am on the verge of handing my notice in as I am, quite frankly, at the end of my tether, but I have no other job to go to and with the jobs market the way it is at the moment it would be a little reckless. However, I do not feel I can go on.

I haven't done anything like gross misconduct, I am basically just bad at my job. I have been in the role since February and was given a written warning last month for failure to do certain parts of my job correctly & follow instructions (none intentionally). I was told if it continued, I would face further disciplinary action which could be a final written warning or, if serious enough, dismissal.

My employer has trained me well and to be honest they have done nothing wrong to me. I am not intentionally bad at my job and I do care about it. Simply put, I cannot fix this. It's like, if someone is facing a disciplinary because they keep calling in sick with no good reason, they can just stop doing it. I do my work in good faith then find out several weeks later that I have messed it up or interpreted the instruction incorrectly. It's not like I am just blithely going on with my work without a care in the world: I am acutely aware every minute of my day (at work or otherwise) that I am failing at my job and I am consciously making an effort, but it is just not making a difference. I cannot stop doing what I am doing, and for that reason a final written warning and eventual dismissal seem certain.

I am 35 years old, have never been subject to disciplinary proceedings, and have never been so bad at a job. Of course, I have had jobs that I have been good at, some brilliant at, and jobs that I'm okay at. I have never failed so spectacularly. I feel pretty ashamed but also at the moment I feel worthless and unemployable.

The main thing this has caused is a total breakdown in my relationship with my boss. He is a good guy, but I think he is finding me increasing hard to bear. I needed to leave work early on Friday for a doctors appointment and he basically told me I would have to work the time back because I "have no holidays left". I know I am entitled to reasonable time off work for doctors appointments, he knows it too, so he is just being difficult.

I am finding this is impacting on me quite heftily psychologically. I recently went on my honeymoon for 2 weeks and had nightmares about work on at least 3 or 4 occasions spread across the fortnight I was away. The only thing I have been clinging onto in recent months is the fact I didn't have long until my holiday, and thereafter only 3 weeks until Christmas. Right now I can barely stand the thought of going to work tomorrow, let alone every day after the Christmas break. Everything I do at work is done with a hint of panic, and all I do at home is worry about the financial burden of leaving my husband to cope with the bills if I am fired, not to mention the shame of actually being fired.

Basically, I want to hand my notice in tomorrow - perhaps even today by e-mail - as I just don't feel able to cope anymore. I am already applying for jobs but I work 8-5 so it's not easy to squeeze in interviews, I have no leave left, and I am terrible at lying. At least if I quit I could devote myself to jobhunting full time and could even temp, but there is still the worry of, very realistically, finding no work for months and months. I feel though that it would look better for me to quit than be fired, and being fired seems certain right now. That said, I have no idea how to explain in interviews why I have quit with no other job lined up (at the moment, it's that I didn't gel with the product, which is sorta true). I have talked this through with my husband and he has eventually said I should hand in my notice, but although I feel a massive sense of relief, the thought of doing so right now terrifies me.

So I am just wondering, does anyone have any advice? Has anyone been in a similar situation? Should I just suck it up and plough on?

Heeeeeelp!

_____________________________

but love is the sky and i am for you
just so long and long enough

Post #: 1

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 9:13:21 AM

Powka

Posts: 132
Joined: 2/12/2008

I wouldn't go on. If you hate the job, then you hate the job. If not tomorrow, then next week or next month, you will still have to give in. Why wait? Drop it, and start looking for something you can do; the sooner, the better. These are not the times of Great Depression, you'll find something eventually, plus you say you've got a husband, which is twice easier with a second half supporting you.

_____________________________

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(in reply to JV)

Post #: 2

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 9:20:42 AM

matty_b

Posts: 12897
Joined: 19/10/2005
From: Outpost 31 calling McMurtle.

The first thing I would do is do some research about any benefits (tax credits I'm guessing) you'd be entitled to if you do drop down to a one-income household. Then have a very frank discussion with your husband about how the change in financial situation would impact upon your day-to-day lives.

If it looks like you can get by, then I would say your best course is to hand your notice in, because it's then your decision and it looks better to future employers. I would have said it's something you could talk to your boss about (for various reasons I haven't had a good time at work recently - although not to the point where I was considering quitting - but a good chat with my boss to let him know I was aware of this really did help), but clearly you can't, which is a shame. Although I am pretty sure you're legally entitled to time off for interviews, but if he's being a dick this might be not so easy, I suppose.

But good luck.

_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cool Breeze
Mattyb is a shining example of what the perfect Empire Forum member is.

(in reply to JV)

Post #: 3

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 9:21:58 AM

porntrooper

Posts: 2497
Joined: 6/9/2006
From: Sheffield

First things first, I would certainly argue you should feel no shame being in the situation you're in. Some people will find certain job roles difficult to manage, not be able to adapt and therefore need to leave that job for other opportunities. Although I've never been in the situation myself, I've had people work for me that were. I actually have respect for someone that can identify themselves that they have an issue, that they aren't adapting to the role, and therefore do what is right by them and the employer and leave.

Like you say, you're not causing issue for your employer due to negligence or gross misconduct, the job is simply not for you.

Years ago when I used to manage people within a call centre it was something we would see often. People would interview well, appear suitable, train well but then when they got on the phones they found they just couldn't do certain things, be it the rapport building, or picking up systems or whatever. As a manager, the people that did me in were the ones that continued in the role and forced me into a position that I had to start handing out warnings to manage them out of the business, making the whole process much more difficult and stressfull for the both of us. The ones I respected were those that went 'you know what, this isn't working for me or you, I'm off'. Easily the best approach.

You know this is damaging you psychologically, you're unhappy and it's clearly making you anxious. Your boss is now probably feeling that too, he/she probably doesn't want to have to go through the dismissal process either as it's never nice to manage someone out of employment. My current boss is going through a similar thing now with a colleague of mine that is unable to perform for us, although he has now been assisted by a restructure which will mean redundancy for this guy. If he hadnt had that option he would have had to push the guy out for not delivering, which makes the whole situation and relationship difficult. I had several conversations with him on that very subject in recent weeks and it was stressing him, and now the redundancy issue has given him a huge peace of mind. You're boss probably isnt wanting it either.

How do you explain why you left the job to future employers? Be honest, the job simply wasnt for you and rather than prevent your employer from having to make difficult decisions, you took action and kept in control. That wouldn't be an issue for me as a potential employer at all.

Truthfully, only you will know the right course of action to take, but I would offer reassurance that it is nothing to be ashamed of and isnt something any future employer should look upon out of favor.

_____________________________

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(in reply to JV)

Post #: 4

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 9:23:48 AM

matty_b

Posts: 12897
Joined: 19/10/2005
From: Outpost 31 calling McMurtle.

quote:

it's never nice to manage someone out of employment.

What a cute way of putting it.

_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cool Breeze
Mattyb is a shining example of what the perfect Empire Forum member is.

(in reply to porntrooper)

Post #: 5

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 9:32:36 AM

sanchia

Posts: 16726
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Norwich

I can tell you what I did in a similar situation. My situation did differ in that I had a boss who was a bully and used to pick a person in the office and then make life so unbearable for them they eventually left, a lot of people who were there who pretended to be friends also turned out to have knife in hand as soon as your back was turned. Eventually it got to me. I ended up almost clinically depressed(doing nothing but going to work, slogging through the day then coming home and going to bed and sleeping about 12 hours, waking tired and going to work), my ability to do the work went right down and I knew that it was a case of either quitting or being shown the door. I personally had saved some money with a view to getting out and was in a situation where I could cope for six months or so without work if it came down to it so made the decision to quit which was like a massive weight off my shoulders and my mental health improved massively almost overnight. The reason I chose to quit was that I did not want the mark of being fired on my CV although I do not know how much impact that has when seeking another job.

At the end of the day I took about a year to get another job (during that time I started posting on these boards in fact). I think you have to weigh the pros and cons of the situation' the impact it is having on our mental health, can you afford to quit as you will be unable to get benefits for a time following this, etc.

I wish you the best no matter what you decide as it is an awful situation to be in.

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Post #: 6

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 10:01:28 AM

elab49

Posts: 51645
Joined: 1/10/2005

You can't keep doing a job that's doing this to you psychologically. It will wear you down and your health will probably get worse - and that's more important than any job. And what you say, that level of focus, constant fear, is a route to depression you might want to talk to your Dr about (that might well give you a way out as well). Because it's clearly affecting your health now.

Practically? Resigning will impact on any support you get if you can't rely on savings so that's something to consider. Resigning can be managed in a CV as well - but is there an issue with notice that might be a problem?

Can I ask if this was an internal promotion? Is there any possibility here of sitting down with your boss and you both being honest (you do think he's a good guy) or does your place have an HR structure? It might be worth just asking for a meeting and being honest. That it's clear things aren't working and what the options are. Getting it out in the open might well be a relief. Are you an internal promotion or external applicant? If internal, is there any possibility of moving side or down to the job you could do and were happy to do? If external, is there a way you can take control of managing an exit that isn't as blunt as an e-mail and makes the move to a next job just that bit smoother?

Although I don't think an e-mail is the way to go I think you do need to take some kind of action soon or your next few weeks will be a right off too and you'll go into 2013 unrested and even more unhappy. And give yourself a break - most people who can't do a job just aren't honest about it and blame others. Although I think you've gone to the extreme of taking all the blame yourself (your boss should communicate better instead of withdrawing which is what he seems to have done).

http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/series/dearjeremy

You could also ask here - the chap that runs this column and the advice they get elsewhere seems quite constructive (and private - if you remove a couple of the more identifying bits like the Dr appt and honeymoon)

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Post #: 7

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 11:31:32 AM

Brooksy84

Posts: 390
Joined: 25/1/2010

I was in a very similar position myself once. I used to be an estate agent, and after a year with one company I was called in to see the area manager and told that I simply wasn't selling enough houses and that I was no longer wanted there. It didn't come out of the blue, I knew my numbers weren't good and I had actually started to look for other jobs to avoid just such a situation. I was advised by a recruitment agent to basically lie about being sacked - he was confident it wouldn't come up in a reference and that if I was honest, no other estate agent would touch me knowing that I'd been let go for failing to sell houses (he was correct, at least on the second part). I managed to get a job with another agent, and lasted six months there before I realised that I would never be a success in that line of work, and gave in my notice.
My problems began when a mate who works for a large bank said he could sort me out a job with him. He did, on a temp to perm contract on a wage at least double anything else I'd ever had. When filling in all the forms there was a question that explicitly asked if I'd ever been fired from another job. Because it was an agency doing the reference checks, and I felt they would be pretty thorough, I decided I had to be honest and hope my reasons (no warnings, no misconduct etc) would be understood. They weren't, and my mate had to inform me that it was company policy not to employ anybody who had been previously fired for whatever reason. I subsequently got myself a bar job, which I've been doing for almost 2 years now, and I made no mention of being sacked at the interview, and I'm guessing it never came up in references.
Cutting a long story short, my own personal advice would be that if you are pretty certain that you will lose your job to hand in your notice. It's tough enough out there without the added problem of explaining away being sacked by your last employer, or facing the difficulty of trying to conceal it forever more. With hindsight I wish I had just asked the area manager if he would accept my notice in lieu of actually firing me, seeing as the end result was the same whether I jumped or was pushed.
Whatever you choose to do I wish you the best of luck and hope you can get something else sorted soon.

_____________________________

http://averagefootballfan.blogspot.co.uk/

(in reply to elab49)

Post #: 8

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 6:46:39 PM

Sledge Hammer

Posts: 1640
Joined: 14/11/2007

All good advice so far.

Another thing I would suggest is that should you decide that you are going to hand in your notice, then talk to your oss.

I guarantee that he wont want to fire you, for no other reason than it means a HR/ paperwork nightmare. If you are going to quit, go talk to him.

Say that you realise that you are not working out and give a statement to all of the above (that you mean well an are not lazy).

Say that you are going to look for other jobs and would like to continue working whilst you look - I am sure that having you there whilst he looks for a replacement is better than not having you there. Tell him you will work until you are replaced to the best of your ability. Explain to him that you dont want a bad reference and are a good person (lie if you have to ;) ) Tell him that you will help train your successor at the things you are good at.

He may have a nice side and give you some more leaway if he knows you are going (or trying to go) - its a long shot but if you are going anyway, then no harm in trying. Worse case scenario, you quit an best case scenario, you carry on for a few more months whilst looking for something new, with the knowledge that you wont get fired.

Good luck and let us know how it all works out.

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Post #: 9

RE: Being fired or resigning - 9/12/2012 6:52:42 PM

Posts: 3506
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: two counties east of home

Thank you all SO much for your honest replies.

First of all, I decided to hand my notice in and have done so by e-mail.

To answer all sorts of questions:

I am not entitled to claim jobseekers allowance for about 6 months after resigning or being fired, so from that perspective it makes no difference what I do. I hadn't thought about tax credits though.

I can't really look to do another job within the organisation. Firstly, there were redundancies back in September because the company is performing so badly. One person had to go from our team and in the end my colleague resigned. My boss made it very clear to me that had she not done so, it would have been my neck on the block. Actually, I have since found out that the person who resigned was told that I couldn't be made redundant as I am the only French speaker so I have no idea if my boss was playing some kind of games with me by trying to make me perform better. However I had already assumed it would be me and, to be honest, I found myself feeling a little angry with my colleague for resigning as I already knew the job wasn't for me by then and being made redundant is the best reason for looking for another job. So it's not possible to move to another area as people were already made redundant, and even on the factory floor (I am prepared to do that sort of work, no worries) they are short of work.

I have already told my boss everything. I have been nothing but totally honest with him. He is a good guy, but he can be absolutely horrid sometimes and after my disciplinary meeting he made snide comments in a couple of e-mails which harked back to things discussed in that meeting - one issue was that I hadn't done something quickly enough that my boss had said was urgent, but my argument was that I was totally unaware of the sense of urgency as I had thought I had longer to do it. He forwarded me something to do that was urgent and put in words to the effect of, "I hope you can grasp the sense of urgency from this since the customer has said they want it tomorrow". Other times he is perfectly reasonable and civil. He knows I am desperately searching for another job as I acknowledge we are not suited to each other as employee/employer. There is nothing further, I feel, that I can do regarding my boss.

And I know how hard it is for him, for a start he is under a lot of pressure being the sales director for a company that hasn't made a profit in nearly a decade. He told me he has never dismissed anyone and has no desire to do so. So we are clear on everything.

My plan of action is: this Friday afternoon I am going to go to all the temp agencies I can find, register with them, and tell them I can start in January. (I work 8-5 Monday-Thursday but finish - usually - at noon on Fridays.... however no one ever seems to want to interview on Friday afternoons!!!) I have already applied for some permanent roles in the past week or so and there is one agency who are pretty good so hopefully something will come up.

Please continue to offer your opinions and advice on this. Obviously my decision has already been made, but it is all I can think about all the same and I am genuinely curious as to how other people have coped previously.

PS Porntrooper, your advice was extremely helpful, thank you!

_____________________________

but love is the sky and i am for you
just so long and long enough

(in reply to Brooksy84)

Post #: 10

RE: Being fired or resigning - 10/12/2012 1:36:02 AM

lulu karma

Posts: 6321
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: on the east coast of the US

It is terrible to dread work every day. I have been in the same situation but was lucky to have other offers come along so I could quit. I finally decided I was done being a Marketing Director and marketing in general. That is the department always hit in an economy downswing. I changed careers. A little scary. I now work 8 to 5, instead of 8am to 9pm. My future income potential is not as high, but I have better job security and I have excellent work / life balance to spend time with my husband and step-children when they are with us.

So maybe you could see if you need to go in a different direction.

_____________________________

I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie and she's Ben Kenobi and we're in that fucked-up bar.

This is the captain speaking. It appears we are going down. Now may be the time to reflect upon your life and pray to whatever deity you believe in. We know you have your choice of airlines and apparently you made the wrong one.

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(in reply to JV)

Post #: 11

RE: Being fired or resigning - 10/12/2012 6:10:35 PM

Goodfella

Posts: 15080
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: North Devon

JV, I think you've made the right choice, and if it's any consolation I'm in different circumstances, but am about to do the same thing next Monday.

I work in a pub, it's far from glamorous as I'm sure you can imagine, I have a degree but that, rightly, guarantees you nothing these days that is any better than a school leaver or an unskilled worker. I've been in this trade on and off for around a decade now (since I was 15) in various roles, throughout my degree I worked at a full-time job as well and I understand the fact that it is mainly anti-social hours, I've never complained, I've frequently done more than my fair share and have given up plenty of summers and Christmases, while others around me have partied, I've usually been at work.

The place I am working at at the moment though is a different kettle of fish, I've worked for some right arseholes, but this on a new level. My current boss, who is the landlord, I've actually known since I moved to the village for quite some time but on a social level, as in I drank and eat in the pub. I'd always heard the stories about him but given how small-town mentalities work I put a lot down to gossip, my big mistake. To put it simply, he's a criminal. An actual criminal. As in he's spent time inside for tax fraud. He's a gambling addict involved in racehorse corruption (some of which I have had the unfortunate mishap of witnessing). He's a user, not too mention a pervert (commenting on the backsides of waitresses young enough to be your granddaughter is not what I call professionalism but there we go!) but now his back is really to the wall. Most of the past five years due to the way he's hemorraghed money due to his handling of both his professional and personal finances (he spends roughly �400 a day at the bookies and is involved in stocks and shares that have crumbled) and he's dodged closure on several occasions (I could post a link here to an article about him and a huge bill he owed and I will do it once I've left, but not before) to the point of where his step-son has actually had to race to the pub to stop the baliffs from turning off the lights, literally. But I now for a fact that he is now in serious trouble, his attitude has changed, he used to put on a facade and fight it all and somehow usually win, but now he's a different person. He's cold and more vaccous than ever before and I know several people who are close to him who have not been paid properly because he thinks he can get away with it, basically I'll be surprised if he's still running anything remotely close to a business by the end of next month.

All this aside though, he's a shit boss. I don't tend to find out any of my shifts until a few days before, he works everyone into the ground, he's horribly disorganised and he's not fair whatsoever. I work 50-70 hour weeks for minimum wage, I rarely get a day off a week let alone two, my holiday doesn't get written down by him so I have to give it up and Christmas is looking like a complete write-off for me, he won't give me any of my shifts cause he "has to check what others want.....need to do first." He's a liar and I know full well that I won't see anything of that week, to top it off we get a 50 quid bonus for working Christmas Day and that's it, no extra pay for any of the other main days. Which means I will basically spend all of that week working for �50 more than I would any other week of the year on the same hours. To give you an idea of the rest of the year round, as of tomorrow I will work 56 hours between then and Sunday night without a day off, the best I will get is on Thursday and Saturday when I will receive a short 90-minute break in the afternoon in which I can leave the premises (but will not be paid for).

Because of all of this, and the moral fact that I don't actually want to help line this prick's pocket anymore, I am turning in my notice next Monday. The reason why I am doing it next Monday is because I know in this rural area I stand no chance of finding anymore work between now and Christmas and may as well hand in a week's notice taking me right up until two days before Christmas Day and get three weeks more worth of wages rather than just sit around in my house waiting for the celebrations to start. I also hope it shafts him a little, I know that sounds bad but the way he has treated me over the past year has made me angry and frustrated that some employers are allowed to behave like this, I'm not in the market of giving him the luxury of time to find someone else. If he doesn't like it, I can always go next Monday and he can work those shifts himself, except he won't so I know I'm pretty safe either way.

I have never been one for quitting a job without another lined up, especially in this part of country, but fact is the place will probably close down next month anyway. Why lose out on a Christmas to earn slightly more money than per usual and then lose that money when I don't get my wages the following month when he goes bust and is liquidated? Obviously there is a slight gamble here (mind you he knows all about that!) but I have been so unhappy of late is it really worth all this for �6.19 an hour is the question I asked myself when I made the decision yesterday? Nope, not in the slightest.

I can't say I dread work though, I like the other people I work with, certain apsects of the job and the customers but I'm at the point where it's just too much, I have no life outside of it and it isn't getting me anywhere. I certainly don't intend on doing another year of this.

_____________________________

"It is the Shawshank Redemption! Just with more tunneling through shit and less fucking redemption."

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(in reply to lulu karma)

Post #: 12

RE: Being fired or resigning - 10/12/2012 9:37:09 PM

Brooksy84

Posts: 390
Joined: 25/1/2010

The joys of bar work mate, I know only too well. I work for a pretty big chain in hospitality but the boss of my pub is still a bit of a knob. Not quite to the extent that yours sounds but I don't trust him an inch. He's got the ENTIRE staff working all day on xmas day, and most people (apart from me thankfully as I'm part time) doing the same shift boxing day. And all for absolutely nothing extra, the company doesn't do additional payments for holiday shifts.
Think you've made the right decision JV, best of luck with your applications.

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(in reply to Goodfella)

Post #: 13

RE: Being fired or resigning - 10/12/2012 9:40:54 PM

Goodfella

Posts: 15080
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: North Devon

quote:

ORIGINAL: Brooksy84

The joys of bar work mate, I know only too well. I work for a pretty big chain in hospitality but the boss of my pub is still a bit of a knob. Not quite to the extent that yours sounds but I don't trust him an inch. He's got the ENTIRE staff working all day on xmas day, and most people (apart from me thankfully as I'm part time) doing the same shift boxing day. And all for absolutely nothing extra, the company doesn't do additional payments for holiday shifts.
Think you've made the right decision JV, best of luck with your applications.

Absolute joke isn't it? Given my bosses record he shouldn't even be working in anything in this industry, let alone running it, but his wife is the licensee and it strikes me these days that it's the devious, dishonest ones who get to the top first. I have no issue working Christmas, but I expect to know what shifts I'm doing more than two days in advance, be paid JUST A LITTLE extra for giving up my entire festive season for them and not work pretty much all week without a break, to then most probably lose my job in January anyway when the liquidators arrive. You look at other jobs where people will be working over Christmas, even the likes of nurses who have to put up with some nasty hours, aren't getting this and most of them are on triple time for it!

_____________________________

"It is the Shawshank Redemption! Just with more tunneling through shit and less fucking redemption."

Last Film Watched: Flight ****

(in reply to Brooksy84)

Post #: 14

RE: Being fired or resigning - 10/12/2012 10:11:02 PM

Sledge Hammer

Posts: 1640
Joined: 14/11/2007

JV - what was your bosses response?

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Post #: 15

RE: Being fired or resigning - 11/12/2012 8:28:53 PM

Posts: 3506
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: two counties east of home

My boss had me in on Monday morning and said he thought he knew my reasons for resigning but asked me to explain them anyway. I just said I didn't feel things were going to get any better, my mental health was nosediving, my relationship with him was shot to pieces and I just couldn't cope anymore. He asked if I had a job to go to, I said I didn't. He was very fair and asked if I was sure I wanted to go ahead and I said yes. He asked me to provide a signed version of the e-mail and that was that. They have agreed to let me finish when we break up for Christmas which means I get paid to the end of this month but finish next Friday.

Overall I feel much better and much happier, I am pretty much a different person at work to the extent that yesterday afternoon I even thought "this isn't bad, why have I resigned?" but the fact is that I only feel that way because I have quit. Otherwise, I would be looking over my shoulder all the time wondering if I would make it through the week without ballsing something up.

Incidentally, I forgot to mention but I was part of a team of 4 people - 3 full-timers & 1 part-timer. Since August one full-timer has left (quit when we were at risk of redundancy), the part-timer is in the process of quitting, and so am I. That leaves 1 full-timer left. They took on a temp to cover my Spanish-speaking work for a fortnight while I was on holiday, decided to keep her on for a couple of months, and at the end of last week - her third week - she told me she doesn't like it and is thinking of leaving!! Now none of these people have the same problems that I do but I think it's telling that 3 out of 4 staff have quit and even the temp is thinking of it!

Goodfella, I feel for ya. Your boss sounds like a prize wanker, get the hell out of there!

_____________________________

but love is the sky and i am for you
just so long and long enough

(in reply to Sledge Hammer)

Post #: 16

RE: Being fired or resigning - 11/12/2012 10:37:16 PM

sharkboy

Posts: 6032
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: Belfast

quote:

ORIGINAL: Goodfella

My current boss...To put it simply, he's a criminal. An actual criminal.

Mate, you should try working for the Northern Ireland government - it's practically listed on the job application as an essential criterion for the politicians!

My first proper job turned out to be a job from hell, and the day that I told my then bosses to stick their job where the sun don't shine was by far the best experience of that particular employment (except for one memorable night with one of the girls from the weaving floor, but no kiss and tell here...

) To be honest, from a career perspective resigning from that job was the best move I could have made. I even managed to convince the dole office that it was effectively constructive dismissal on their part (which it kinda was), and didn't have any 6-month wait for benefits. As it was, I got my next job within 6 months

So, basically, if your job is placing you under so much pressure, then get out. It's really not worth the stress. Just because we're in a bit of an economic downturn doesn't necessarily mean long-time unemployment is all you cal look forward to. There are jobs out there. And if, like JV, you have a very particular skill-set then there'll always be a demand, even if it means a bit more commuting.

_____________________________

WWLD?

Every time we think we have measured our capacity to meet a challenge, we look up and we're reminded that that capacity may well be limitless

I left in love, in laughter, and in truth and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.

(in reply to Goodfella)

Post #: 17

RE: Being fired or resigning - 12/12/2012 8:04:34 AM

The2ndRing

Posts: 3950
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: rehab

HI JV, this does sound like a horrible, situation to be in. Make sure you look back and were definitely appropriately supported and managed, if you get to a point that you are so unhappy in your job, you may have a case for constructive dismissal. Let me know if you want anymore info :)

_____________________________

I've been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library

"Do you know what I like about you?
Fuck all."

(in reply to sharkboy)

Post #: 18

RE: Being fired or resigning - 12/12/2012 9:54:30 AM

paulyboy

Posts: 2151
Joined: 30/9/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: sharkboy

I even managed to convince the dole office that it was effectively constructive dismissal on their part (which it kinda was), and didn't have any 6-month wait for benefits.

Worth bearing in mind is this JV, given your circumstances I think a fair case could be made for resigning on medical grounds (which can include workplace stress), my mother did the same thing once, but she'd been to the quacks and all sorts, not sure how you'd go about proving such a thing in your case.

_____________________________

"Pain heals, chicks dig scars, glory lasts forever!"

(in reply to sharkboy)

Post #: 19

RE: Being fired or resigning - 12/12/2012 5:49:10 PM

Hood_Man

Posts: 11283
Joined: 30/9/2005

I've got a horrible feeling I'm going to be in this situation soon... I've only been working here since October but I've never felt so utterly inept at anything in my life, and I've already had a complaint made against me because of it.

Ugh...

(in reply to paulyboy)

Post #: 20

RE: Being fired or resigning - 12/12/2012 10:56:31 PM

Toby Monroe

Posts: 1557
Joined: 30/9/2005

Have a baby, adopt a baby, foster a baby, snatch a baby (don't snatch a baby).

Baby = maternity leave.

_____________________________

Fit or Fugly score: 3/10

(in reply to Hood_Man)

Post #: 21

RE: Being fired or resigning - 14/12/2012 9:52:28 PM

Posts: 3506
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: two counties east of home

Funnily enough, Toby, my mate said the same thing! "Have the post-honeymoon baby".

The trouble with that is... well, I'd have to have a baby!!

Anyway, got an interview on Monday, met with an agency today for a position they are going to put me forward for, and I heard back from another job I applied for and it seems the company in question is expressing an interest in me.

That said, that's just 3 jobs out of about 20 I have applied for......

Fingers crossed for me!

_____________________________

but love is the sky and i am for you
just so long and long enough

(in reply to Toby Monroe)

Post #: 22

RE: Being fired or resigning - 14/12/2012 9:56:43 PM

Posts: 3506
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: two counties east of home

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hood_Man

I've got a horrible feeling I'm going to be in this situation soon... I've only been working here since October but I've never felt so utterly inept at anything in my life, and I've already had a complaint made against me because of it.

Ugh...

Hoody, you have my sympathy. I feel so inept at my job. Hugs!

In fact, I found another mistake this week whichis huuuuge. I am too honest and usually own up to stuff straight away without having to be asked. I think in this case I am going to do all I can to hide it until after I've left so I can avoid a confrontation with my boss. I say "hide" it but I have thought of a resolution for the customer involved which will hopefully keep it hidden from my boss until after I've gone. I just cannot stomach having to admit it to my boss, but that doesn't mean I don't want to sort the problem out.

_____________________________

but love is the sky and i am for you
just so long and long enough

(in reply to Hood_Man)

Post #: 23

RE: Being fired or resigning - 17/12/2012 6:08:04 PM

Goodfella

Posts: 15080
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: North Devon

Well I handed my notice in today, my boss wasn't there, he was away yesterday and most of today but he should be getting in about three and a bit hours. I handed it to a trusted colleague who's reaction was, "sad to see you go darling, but I don't blame you one bit, he's absolutely taken the piss out of you, he can't honestly be surprised."

The last five days have re-affirmed my desire to leave. I have learnt that I'm being paid less than the 15 year-old kps, our "head waitress" who doesn't do her job properly is getting extra money slipped into her paypacket (by him because he doesn't want his wife to know) to keep her there and I have done 24 hours in two days and have basically been running the joint why he's not been there, no-one got paid yesterday because he hadn't sorted out the wages before he left and didn't tell anyone, resulting in yours faithfully having to deal with the onslaught by off-duty staff yesterday. On Friday I had been questioning my intention to leave, by this morning I was ready to take the notice and ram it so far up his arse it would meet his breakfast. Little does he know, the way I have been treated over the last five days, let alone the past 10 or so months, has killed him as far as I'm concerned and as I left on Saturday night the desperation in his voice as he apologised for the mess I'd been left with and tried to buy me off with free drinks, I think he knew it.

I have also learnt some very disturbing things about him that I simply can't post on here, a lot about his past that have left me questioning even myself, there is a small chance that I could at some point in the future be giving a statement to officials from certain authorities about him, especially if the bankruptcy most fear does eventually happen.

With regards to the money, it's not that I expected to be paid more, it's that I expect to be treated the same as others in the unskilled positions. I have no issue whatsoever with being paid less than a chef from a michelin-starred background, but I do have an issue with being paid less than a 15 year-old schoolboy. When one of the chefs found out I wasn't even being paid the same amount as him, he was stunned and said I should go in and demand a pay rise given my position of responsibility and the amount of and anti-social hours I work. Personally that's of no interest to me anymore, I've saved well, I've had little life while I've been working there so finances are not a motivator for me anymore. There's literally nothing he could offer to me tonight that would make me stay longer than the week, if he has an issue with the timeframe and he wants the inevitable conversation to go south then I can finish now. He's made the bed, now he's got to lie in it.

Good luck to both of you, Hoody and JV, with your future circumstances! It may be a cliche but life is too short for this, as long as your reasonably safe financially then don't put your health and state of mind at risk for this kind of thing, most of us never get the job we really want. But this is the other end of the spectrum and that is simply not acceptable.

_____________________________

"It is the Shawshank Redemption! Just with more tunneling through shit and less fucking redemption."

Last Film Watched: Flight ****

(in reply to JV)

Post #: 24

RE: Being fired or resigning - 17/12/2012 6:11:02 PM

Hood_Man

Posts: 11283
Joined: 30/9/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: JV
Hoody, you have my sympathy. I feel so inept at my job. Hugs!

I do feel a bit better now than I did when I said that, but I still feel like I'm expected to be a lot better at this than I actually am. In time maybe it'll improve, but the sooner I get off the phones the better!

(in reply to JV)

Post #: 25

RE: Being fired or resigning - 17/12/2012 6:39:53 PM

sanchia

Posts: 16726
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Norwich

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hood_Man

quote:

ORIGINAL: JV
Hoody, you have my sympathy. I feel so inept at my job. Hugs!

I do feel a bit better now than I did when I said that, but I still feel like I'm expected to be a lot better at this than I actually am. In time maybe it'll improve, but the sooner I get off the phones the better!

I think there is a lot of expectation nowadays for people to go into a job get twenty minutes training and then be able to handle every variable which comes in. It is not a good thing as even five years into my job I still find myself making some things up as I go.

_____________________________

Nothing to see here.

(in reply to Hood_Man)

Post #: 26

RE: Being fired or resigning - 19/12/2012 5:50:05 PM

Goodfella

Posts: 15080
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: North Devon

Professionalism meet my boss, my boss, meet professionalism.

Two days ago I handed in my notice. It's taken him until the middle of the afternoon today to really acknowledge my existence, and even say anything about it whatsoever. And what he did say was so bloody hypocritical I could have slapped him. Given the way he's messed me around over my hours, given the way he's never let me know any of my shifts within a reasonable timeframe and the general way I'm treated there from my pay to other members of staff leaving me messes to clean up, he asked me what was wrong and then proceeded to say "it drops him in a bit being so close to Christmas." My response, "well sometimes that's just the way the ball rolls." Perhaps he should go away and think about that, these things can work both ways.

When I went to play skittles last night it was so frosty, the head waitress isn't talking to me although I can't tell whether it's just banter, if it's not it's probably cause she's now going to actually have to get off her arse, not eat all the desserts and do some work over the next two weeks. 10 months at that place in which I've worked more than some others have in two years there and not even a thank you for what I've done.

Oh well I'm rid of the place and it won't be around much longer anyway, nice for some of the more mature members of staff to tell me they're going to miss me but understand why I've done it, says a lot really. If the impressionable, lazy teenagers want to buy his nonsense then let them I say.

Saturday is my final set of shifts, a nice 13-hour one. Be the best 13 hours I've ever spent there I reckon!

_____________________________

"It is the Shawshank Redemption! Just with more tunneling through shit and less fucking redemption."

Last Film Watched: Flight ****

(in reply to sanchia)

Post #: 27

RE: Being fired or resigning - 20/12/2012 8:51:37 AM

Chief

Posts: 7018
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: The Kingdom, Scotland

quote:

ORIGINAL: Goodfella

Professionalism meet my boss, my boss, meet professionalism.

Two days ago I handed in my notice. It's taken him until the middle of the afternoon today to really acknowledge my existence, and even say anything about it whatsoever. And what he did say was so bloody hypocritical I could have slapped him. Given the way he's messed me around over my hours, given the way he's never let me know any of my shifts within a reasonable timeframe and the general way I'm treated there from my pay to other members of staff leaving me messes to clean up, he asked me what was wrong and then proceeded to say "it drops him in a bit being so close to Christmas." My response, "well sometimes that's just the way the ball rolls." Perhaps he should go away and think about that, these things can work both ways.

When I went to play skittles last night it was so frosty, the head waitress isn't talking to me although I can't tell whether it's just banter, if it's not it's probably cause she's now going to actually have to get off her arse, not eat all the desserts and do some work over the next two weeks. 10 months at that place in which I've worked more than some others have in two years there and not even a thank you for what I've done.

Oh well I'm rid of the place and it won't be around much longer anyway, nice for some of the more mature members of staff to tell me they're going to miss me but understand why I've done it, says a lot really. If the impressionable, lazy teenagers want to buy his nonsense then let them I say.

Saturday is my final set of shifts, a nice 13-hour one. Be the best 13 hours I've ever spent there I reckon!

Sounds like you've a had a shitty time, I probably wouldn't have bothered with the weeks notice and just walked out after the stuff at the weekend.

(in reply to Goodfella)

Post #: 28

RE: Being fired or resigning - 20/12/2012 9:31:00 AM

Hood_Man

Posts: 11283
Joined: 30/9/2005

I hope you have an awesome Christmas Goodfella

(in reply to Chief)

Post #: 29

RE: Being fired or resigning - 20/12/2012 9:37:45 AM

sharkboy

Posts: 6032
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: Belfast

Personally, from what you've described I think that is the best move you could have made. You've managed to stay professional in your attitude but still enjoyed dropping your boss in the shit - win/win!

Onwards and upwards, Goodfella!

_____________________________

WWLD?

Every time we think we have measured our capacity to meet a challenge, we look up and we're reminded that that capacity may well be limitless

I left in love, in laughter, and in truth and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.

(in reply to Hood_Man)

Post #: 30