RE: Bus and train nutters

Follow @empiremagazine

Forum Home

Register for Free!

Log In

Moderator Tickets

FAQ

Users Online

RE: Bus and train nutters

Logged in as: Guest

Printable Version

All Forums >> [On Another Note...] >> Off Topic >> RE: Bus and train nutters

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Bus and train nutters - 29/9/2012 12:22:43 PM

matty_b

Posts: 12875
Joined: 19/10/2005
From: Outpost 31 calling McMurtle.

I had another one, less amusing, when someone clearly off their heads on drugs (their eyes were rolling back into their head) sat opposite me on a train and rambled at me for 40 minutes about nothing in particular.

Pretty harmless, but the conductor had notified the police so when they picked him up at the next spot, they searched the toilet he'd been in and found a bunch of used needles.

_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cool Breeze
Mattyb is a shining example of what the perfect Empire Forum member is.

(in reply to sanchia)

Post #: 61

RE: Bus and train nutters - 29/9/2012 12:35:27 PM

superdan

Posts: 7227
Joined: 31/7/2008

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PyW0riD54nY

(in reply to matty_b)

Post #: 62

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 3:24:22 PM

Harley Quinn

Posts: 5766
Joined: 23/1/2008
From: Arkham

Not on a bus, but I was in MacDonalds and went to sit on a free table. The lady who was sitting two tables over started shouting at me because she didn't want people near her and that's why she'd picked this table. Thanked me for ruining her meal and then stormed out.

I also used to be the queen of arguing on public transport.

I was heavily pregnant and a man in his late 50's tried to make me get up and give him my seat because he was old. When I pointed out I was pregnant his response was to repeat that he was old. My reply I told him to fuck off and bother someone else. Which then lead to me being tutted at by people.

I have more stories but I think it will just prove that sometimes I'm the nutter on the bus.

_____________________________

"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path."

Owner of the Naughty Milkmaid.

(in reply to superdan)

Post #: 63

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 3:35:47 PM

DancingClown

Posts: 3573
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: The Lot

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harley Quinn

I was heavily pregnant and a man in his late 50's tried to make me get up and give him my seat because he was old. When I pointed out I was pregnant his response was to repeat that he was old. My reply I told him to fuck off and bother someone else. Which then lead to me being tutted at by people.

I'm with you here, but why did he target you? Surely it was down to someone else to offer their seat?

_____________________________

Astronomic Tune Boy

'The town knew darkness, and darkness was enough.'

"Storm just bleeewwww me away..."

(in reply to Harley Quinn)

Post #: 64

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 3:44:57 PM

Harley Quinn

Posts: 5766
Joined: 23/1/2008
From: Arkham

quote:

ORIGINAL: DancingClown

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harley Quinn

I was heavily pregnant and a man in his late 50's tried to make me get up and give him my seat because he was old. When I pointed out I was pregnant his response was to repeat that he was old. My reply I told him to fuck off and bother someone else. Which then lead to me being tutted at by people.

I'm with you here, but why did he target you? Surely it was down to someone else to offer their seat?

Because I was the youngest person sitting downstairs on the bus, the route was fondly know as the OAP express.

_____________________________

"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path."

Owner of the Naughty Milkmaid.

(in reply to DancingClown)

Post #: 65

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 4:16:55 PM

moontheloon

Posts: 6170
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: Birmingham

I get that sometimes. I'm relatively young but I have an ongoing knee and ankle problem which is mostly okay but sometimes gets really painful. So sometimes when I am sitting on the bus, my knee is in a great deal of pain, an old person gets on and stands near me, and I can feel everyone looking at me with disgust as if to say "get up you rude selfish child, someone who has difficulty standing up has got on the bus". Makes me feel like a prat but not as much as if I simply started speaking loudly about how much my knee hurt

I tend to catch at least 3 buses a day between getting to and from work. They're mostly okay in the morning as the nutters tend to still be in bed (but they sure as hell find me at work), but sometimes going home I get some right weirdos talking to me.

One time, not on my way to work actually, but to the cinema in the middle of the day, a Spanish Gardener started talking to me at the bus stop. He asked me where I was from, I told him Birmingham and he remarked how he thought I was Greek because I had 'Greek hair', he then started telling me all about his life and his family and friends as I politely tried to not spur him on any more. He then got on the same bus as me and sat next to me and carried on talking at me about how much he loved the UK. I had luckily envisaged this and had already told him I was only going a couple of stops so got off and waited 15 minutes for the next bus.

I don't know whether that just makes me sound anti social or not....

_____________________________

A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night and in between he does what he wants to do

(in reply to Harley Quinn)

Post #: 66

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 4:44:06 PM

Shifty Bench

Posts: 14565
Joined: 30/9/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harley Quinn

Not on a bus, but I was in MacDonalds and went to sit on a free table. The lady who was sitting two tables over started shouting at me because she didn't want people near her and that's why she'd picked this table. Thanked me for ruining her meal and then stormed out.

I saw a guy pee in a train once. In front of people. That was crazy.

_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: matty_b
You have a nice face, Shifty. A face I would have a cup of tea with.

quote:

ORIGINAL: porntrooper
Shifty said it best

(in reply to Harley Quinn)

Post #: 67

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 5:38:45 PM

superdan

Posts: 7227
Joined: 31/7/2008

I was in McDonalds once and saw a guy laugh so hard he threw up all over the table. This made the woman on the next table instantly gather up her meal, kid, shopping and everything and storm out in disgust. It was particularly embarrassing as the guy was my mate and it was us lot that had made him laugh.

(in reply to Shifty Bench)

Post #: 68

RE: Bus and train nutters - 30/9/2012 7:29:49 PM

Sway

Posts: 8878
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: Albuquerque

On my way home on a busy train from Glasgow one day and I'd thankfully booked a seat in advance. I happened to be sitting on an inside seat next to the window and a middle aged chap had the seat next to me. We naturally struck up causal chit chat as the train filled up, saying we were lucky we'd booked in advance etc.

About one stop down the line a really old gentleman came on and there was absolutely no free seats at all, so he had to stand in the aisle like a couple of other people were doing. I figured somebody sitting close to him would surely offer up their seat, but nope. I was just thinking about offering mine when I heard the table next to me, which was crammed with middle aged women, all tutting in disgust and talking about how it was awful that nobody was offering their seat to him.

That really riled me up. Firstly it was going to make it look like I bowed to their social pressure when I did offer my seat and secondly, what the fuck is wrong with any of those lazy judgemental fucks getting off their fat arses to offer him one of their seats since they were right next to him?

Anyway what really was the icing on the cake was when I said to the chap sitting next to me that I was going to offer this old man my seat (because he was going to have to move when I did) he said, 'Well, that's up to you. I personally wouldn't. People that old should know not to travel at peak times like this.'

What a disgusting fucking attitude. What in fuckety is wrong with people these days? Where has simple common decency gone?

I did offer my seat, and the old man politely declined, despite the fact I tried to insist (politely though, not being overbearing about it), but at least somebody bloody offered.

_____________________________

"I am not in danger, Skyler. I AM the danger! A guy opens his door and gets shot and you think that of me? No. I am the one who knocks!"

(in reply to superdan)

Post #: 69

RE: Bus and train nutters - 1/10/2012 7:15:26 AM

Posts: 3505
Joined: 26/9/2005
From: two counties east of home

I live near Mansfield, where the public transport is generally shit.

Once, last December, I was sitting in front of someone who was chatting away on the phone about how she couldn't do xyz because there was a warrant outstanding for her arrest.

And another time, just a couple of weeks ago, the girl sitting next to me was having a heated discussion (also on the phone, thankfully) about how her boyfriend was on parole, they'd had an argument and he was threatening to go out, do something to get arrested & sent back to prison.

_____________________________

but love is the sky and i am for you
just so long and long enough

(in reply to Sway)

Post #: 70

RE: Bus and train nutters - 1/10/2012 12:41:51 PM

jcthefirst

Posts: 4076
Joined: 6/10/2005
From: Bangor

I used to love hearing the smackheads talking in code on the phone about the drugs they were planning on taking that night.

"Here mate, you bringing any bumbles with you tonight?"

_____________________________

@Jonny_C85

My Movie Blog | My Other Various Rantings Blog

(in reply to JV)

Post #: 71

RE: Bus and train nutters - 4/10/2012 1:45:33 AM

OPEN YOUR EYES

Posts: 3468
Joined: 5/2/2012
From: Living on Lynch's quiff

The bus I take to town goes through this rough area where it is ,usually,pelted by stones by small chavi/gypo children.
Oh the innocence of youth.

_____________________________

?eeffoc emos ekil uoy dluow

(in reply to jcthefirst)

Post #: 72

RE: Bus and train nutters - 4/10/2012 2:48:50 PM

porntrooper

Posts: 2497
Joined: 6/9/2006
From: Sheffield

Years ago I used to use Sheffield's SuperTram to get to and from work, it had its fair share of nutters, but one occasion stands out in my mind and I may have mentioned it on the forums before... christ knows why though.

Anyway, stood waiting for a Tram, it's mid afternoon, maybe 2pm-ish. The Tram Stop was pretty busy with plenty of people around and I'm just stood waiting, looking up the road for the next Tram to come alone, when I can hear a noise. A running and splashing of water or something..... I turned and looked down the road, maybe there was something splashing from a car or lorry? Nope, it's not raining. It's still going. I turn round again and there, just behind me is a woman, I'd say in her fifties. She looks relatively normal, she's dressed relatively well and she appears clean, she's holding a shopping bag in each hand, and is wearing a long dress just ast her knees. The sound is definately coming from her. I look her over again, only this time looking down to her legs, her calfs and her shoes. She's stood with her legs shoulder length apart and there between her legs on the pavement below and gushing down in a torrent...... piss. This seemingly normal woman is stood at the Tram Stop pissing. She is stood, legs apart, pissing on the pavement. She isn't makig any noise or looking shocked or embarrased, she's just blankly staring up the road.....pissing. She's pissing. She stops pissing. Calm and collected she steps over her puddle of piss (it's a huge puddle of piss I should add) and waits. The Tram arrives, she gets on and sits down. It's as if it never happened, or as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

As I sat on the Tram on my way to work one thing really bugged me about the whole situation. Her underwear. So, either she was wearing them or not. If she was, they're now saturated with piss, if not, she left the house that morning wearing no underwear, and I have to question why? Is the street pissing such a regular occurance that she just doesnt bother with underwear any more? Fucking hell. That was so, so fucking wierd.

_____________________________

"I've got an idea for a special infiltration technique. It involves draining a man of his blood and replacing it with Tizer."

(in reply to OPEN YOUR EYES)

Post #: 73

RE: Bus and train nutters - 4/10/2012 3:15:29 PM

Chief

Posts: 7012
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: The Kingdom, Scotland

quote:

ORIGINAL: porntrooper

Years ago I used to use Sheffield's SuperTram to get to and from work, it had its fair share of nutters, but one occasion stands out in my mind and I may have mentioned it on the forums before... christ knows why though.

Anyway, stood waiting for a Tram, it's mid afternoon, maybe 2pm-ish. The Tram Stop was pretty busy with plenty of people around and I'm just stood waiting, looking up the road for the next Tram to come alone, when I can hear a noise. A running and splashing of water or something..... I turned and looked down the road, maybe there was something splashing from a car or lorry? Nope, it's not raining. It's still going. I turn round again and there, just behind me is a woman, I'd say in her fifties. She looks relatively normal, she's dressed relatively well and she appears clean, she's holding a shopping bag in each hand, and is wearing a long dress just ast her knees. The sound is definately coming from her. I look her over again, only this time looking down to her legs, her calfs and her shoes. She's stood with her legs shoulder length apart and there between her legs on the pavement below and gushing down in a torrent...... piss. This seemingly normal woman is stood at the Tram Stop pissing. She is stood, legs apart, pissing on the pavement. She isn't makig any noise or looking shocked or embarrased, she's just blankly staring up the road.....pissing. She's pissing. She stops pissing. Calm and collected she steps over her puddle of piss (it's a huge puddle of piss I should add) and waits. The Tram arrives, she gets on and sits down. It's as if it never happened, or as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

As I sat on the Tram on my way to work one thing really bugged me about the whole situation. Her underwear. So, either she was wearing them or not. If she was, they're now saturated with piss, if not, she left the house that morning wearing no underwear, and I have to question why? Is the street pissing such a regular occurance that she just doesnt bother with underwear any more? Fucking hell. That was so, so fucking wierd.

She was probably just French.

(in reply to porntrooper)

Post #: 74

RE: Bus and train nutters - 4/10/2012 3:30:35 PM

porntrooper

Posts: 2497
Joined: 6/9/2006
From: Sheffield

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chief

quote:

ORIGINAL: porntrooper

Years ago I used to use Sheffield's SuperTram to get to and from work, it had its fair share of nutters, but one occasion stands out in my mind and I may have mentioned it on the forums before... christ knows why though.

Anyway, stood waiting for a Tram, it's mid afternoon, maybe 2pm-ish. The Tram Stop was pretty busy with plenty of people around and I'm just stood waiting, looking up the road for the next Tram to come alone, when I can hear a noise. A running and splashing of water or something..... I turned and looked down the road, maybe there was something splashing from a car or lorry? Nope, it's not raining. It's still going. I turn round again and there, just behind me is a woman, I'd say in her fifties. She looks relatively normal, she's dressed relatively well and she appears clean, she's holding a shopping bag in each hand, and is wearing a long dress just ast her knees. The sound is definately coming from her. I look her over again, only this time looking down to her legs, her calfs and her shoes. She's stood with her legs shoulder length apart and there between her legs on the pavement below and gushing down in a torrent...... piss. This seemingly normal woman is stood at the Tram Stop pissing. She is stood, legs apart, pissing on the pavement. She isn't makig any noise or looking shocked or embarrased, she's just blankly staring up the road.....pissing. She's pissing. She stops pissing. Calm and collected she steps over her puddle of piss (it's a huge puddle of piss I should add) and waits. The Tram arrives, she gets on and sits down. It's as if it never happened, or as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

As I sat on the Tram on my way to work one thing really bugged me about the whole situation. Her underwear. So, either she was wearing them or not. If she was, they're now saturated with piss, if not, she left the house that morning wearing no underwear, and I have to question why? Is the street pissing such a regular occurance that she just doesnt bother with underwear any more? Fucking hell. That was so, so fucking wierd.

She was probably just French.

Oui

_____________________________

"I've got an idea for a special infiltration technique. It involves draining a man of his blood and replacing it with Tizer."

(in reply to Chief)

Post #: 75

RE: Bus and train nutters - 4/10/2012 3:50:07 PM

OPEN YOUR EYES

Posts: 3468
Joined: 5/2/2012
From: Living on Lynch's quiff

quote:

ORIGINAL: porntrooper

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chief

quote:

ORIGINAL: porntrooper

Years ago I used to use Sheffield's SuperTram to get to and from work, it had its fair share of nutters, but one occasion stands out in my mind and I may have mentioned it on the forums before... christ knows why though.

Anyway, stood waiting for a Tram, it's mid afternoon, maybe 2pm-ish. The Tram Stop was pretty busy with plenty of people around and I'm just stood waiting, looking up the road for the next Tram to come alone, when I can hear a noise. A running and splashing of water or something..... I turned and looked down the road, maybe there was something splashing from a car or lorry? Nope, it's not raining. It's still going. I turn round again and there, just behind me is a woman, I'd say in her fifties. She looks relatively normal, she's dressed relatively well and she appears clean, she's holding a shopping bag in each hand, and is wearing a long dress just ast her knees. The sound is definately coming from her. I look her over again, only this time looking down to her legs, her calfs and her shoes. She's stood with her legs shoulder length apart and there between her legs on the pavement below and gushing down in a torrent...... piss. This seemingly normal woman is stood at the Tram Stop pissing. She is stood, legs apart, pissing on the pavement. She isn't makig any noise or looking shocked or embarrased, she's just blankly staring up the road.....pissing. She's pissing. She stops pissing. Calm and collected she steps over her puddle of piss (it's a huge puddle of piss I should add) and waits. The Tram arrives, she gets on and sits down. It's as if it never happened, or as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

As I sat on the Tram on my way to work one thing really bugged me about the whole situation. Her underwear. So, either she was wearing them or not. If she was, they're now saturated with piss, if not, she left the house that morning wearing no underwear, and I have to question why? Is the street pissing such a regular occurance that she just doesnt bother with underwear any more? Fucking hell. That was so, so fucking wierd.

She was probably just French.

Oui