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RE: The Expendables 2 - 16/8/2012 11:21:19 PM

Rgirvan44

Posts: 18931
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Punishment Park

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hood_Man

I don't know what constitutes good dialogue or good acting for some people, as far as I'm concerned if a character is believable within the constraints of their movie universe that's fine with me, and if the dialogue is quotable it works for me too.

I don't remember a single line of dialogue in The Piano that was anywhere near as good as "Bunch of slack-jawed faggots around here. This stuff will make you a god damned sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me"

But that is what I mean - it is neither memorable or good. It just sits there.

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Post #: 151

RE: The Expendables 2 - 16/8/2012 11:22:30 PM

MonsterCat

Posts: 6393
Joined: 24/3/2011
From: St. Albans, Hertfordshire

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hood_Man

I don't know what constitutes good dialogue or good acting for some people, as far as I'm concerned if a character is believable within the constraints of their movie universe that's fine with me, and if the dialogue is quotable it works for me too.

I don't remember a single line of dialogue in The Piano that was anywhere near as good as "Bunch of slack-jawed faggots around here. This stuff will make you a god damned sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me"

Predator > The Piano.

I know I'm not doing my film snob image any good by saying that, but still...

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Post #: 152

RE: The Predictables - 16/8/2012 11:29:14 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: chris kilby

quote:

ORIGINAL: clownfoot

Isn't there a bit in Scott Pilgrim with a French speaking Hungarian, or am I imagining things again?

I have heard hushed whispers in the darkened corners of the internet of the epic, nay, legendary Scott Pilgrim V The Expendables flame war. Let me guess - irate, knuckle-dragging action fans took exception to the former getting more stars than the latter, yes...?

I don't want the details of that thread because, in my imagination, it's a "Who Would Win in a Fight?" debate that I don't want spoiled

(in reply to chris kilby)

Post #: 153

RE: The Predictables - 16/8/2012 11:34:39 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: bbobeckyj

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rebel scum

quote:

ORIGINAL: bbobeckyj
Point being how many of these films deserve the rating they were given and have stood the test of time to be remembered and revered as a classic? -
King Kong
Cloverfield
Attack of the clones
Intolerable cruelty
Moulin Rouge
Or some 4 star -
War of the worlds
X-men
Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull

Those ones do, in my opinion. Cloverfield and Intolerable Cruelty onto got 4 stars by the way. Plenty of others are pushing it-I know Moulin Rouge and King Kong still have a vocal fanbase.

And everyone gets blinded by hype. Don't tell me you've never seen a film, thought it was awesome, then seen it later and realised it's not as good divorced from the buildup and excitement. I know I have.

http://www.empireonline.com/reviews/5star/
Lists all of them, they're on there.
The Coens are a good example
O Brother, Where Art Thou?, 5, Intolerable cruelty, 5, The ladykillers, 3, Burn after reading, 4, all films with a similar tone, only the first and the last of those probably got the rating they deserve.
You can literally see them giving stars based on prior reviews, and not on merit, the middle two films are 2 star or 3 at best. As they actually said in the attack of the clones review- 'we gave the last one 4, so this being better must be a 5...' (which interestingly has now been downgraded to 3 stars) but in this case you can imagine them sitting in the office saying 'we gave the last one a 5 and this is not much worse, so lets give it a 3...'

Empire giving the Ladykillers 3 stars proves pro-Coen bias? Why wouldn't they give it five or four stars?

It was 10 years ago, and I'm not the memory man, but I thought the original Attack of the Clones was more "the last one sucked but make no mistake...George Lucas is back!" and so on. The reference to the original Phantom Menace was (IIRC) surely more of a "if that got 4 stars, this deserves 20!" playful hyperbole.

(in reply to bbobeckyj)

Post #: 154

RE: The Predictables - 16/8/2012 11:36:22 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: chris kilby

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rgirvan44

Why do you keep using words that no one else uses?

And what do they mean?

That's what they said to Dr Johnson. Titty-bye, for now. I'm off to ablute my epidermal keratin filaments...

That sounds like a Will Self film review.

(in reply to chris kilby)

Post #: 155

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 9:46:38 AM

Russ Whitfield

Posts: 425
Joined: 10/4/2012

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

It wouldn't have surprised me if this movie would have been better without Chuck Norris. With the Chuck Norris joke meme, people appear to have forgotten that he's only ever actually been in one decent film... in which he loses to Bruce Lee. The rest of his filmography is cringe-worthy direct to DVD quality crap.

Amen. How the hell did he manage to get put up there with Arnie and Sly?

What!?! You've clearly never seen "Invasion US-Chuck", "Lone Wolf McChuck", "Chuck in Action (I, II AND III)" and "Delta Chuck" (1 AND 2). "Delta Chuck 1" deserves a special mention because its actually two films in one.

Force of Chuck.
The OctoChuck...

He's the action gift of the 70s/80s that kept on giving.

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Post #: 156

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 9:51:23 AM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: Russ Whitfield

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

It wouldn't have surprised me if this movie would have been better without Chuck Norris. With the Chuck Norris joke meme, people appear to have forgotten that he's only ever actually been in one decent film... in which he loses to Bruce Lee. The rest of his filmography is cringe-worthy direct to DVD quality crap.

Amen. How the hell did he manage to get put up there with Arnie and Sly?

What!?! You've clearly never seen "Invasion US-Chuck", "Lone Wolf McChuck", "Chuck in Action (I, II AND III)" and "Delta Chuck" (1 AND 2). "Delta Chuck 1" deserves a special mention because its actually two films in one.

Force of Chuck.
The OctoChuck...

He's the action gift of the 70s/80s that kept on giving.

Are they good films or "so bad they're good films"?

I know lots of hipster wankers might "ironically" enjoy Stallone and Arnie but they both made genuinely excellent action films!

(in reply to Russ Whitfield)

Post #: 157

RE: 2 Star Review - 17/8/2012 9:59:42 AM

Wild about Wilder

Posts: 1505
Joined: 9/4/2010
From: Hertfordshire

Sly & the boys back with Arnie, Bruce & Chuck in toe + West directing = an 80s Action boys wet dream.

= me

(in reply to Rgirvan44)

Post #: 158

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 10:23:21 AM

Russ Whitfield

Posts: 425
Joined: 10/4/2012

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

Are they good films or "so bad they're good films"? I know lots of hipster wankers might "ironically" enjoy Stallone and Arnie but they both made genuinely excellent action films!

All joking aside - they were very much of their time, I think, sometimes raising the bar of Rambo: First Blood Part II's perceived jingoism to new heights. I watched Missing in Action (or Chuck in Action) recently, and some of the USA! USA! stuff was really toe-curling. But, at the time, I never even noticed it. America was our greatest ally (and we were theirs, in fact), the gooks were commies, ivans were commies, they were the enemy and deserved to have some US of pAin dealt out to them.

I don't even think these movies set out to be overtly political - they weren't smart enough for that. They were what they were because things were the way they were.

Now we're all older AND the world is a different place - you'd not get away with it nowadays. It's been years since I've seen many of these films, but most had the same plot. Like Seagal, Chuck was invariably ex-CIA/ex-Special Forces. He always lived in the wilderness and had a native bloke as his mate. The "Company" representative (always a hateful sleaze-bag who was going to double cross... and die... in that order) would show up and demand Chuck do "one last job." He'd threaten, but no-one threatens Chuck and is put bang to rights. However, baddie du jour will learn that Chuck is still alive and demand that he's taken out. He'll explain to his henchman that "Chuck is the one man he fears..." and then shoot the henchman for his impertinence. Goons would be despatched, but they never got Chuck... they always got his native mate... After a brief period of mourning (involving a montage and Chuck sitting on the ruins of the house that he and the native dude constructed with their bare hands), Chuck would unleash his own brand of twin-mirco-uzi justice on the enemy, saving the day, the USA AND THE WORLD.

Fuck this, I'm off to HMV.

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Post #: 159

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 10:52:11 AM

Harry Tuttle

Posts: 7609
Joined: 12/11/2005
From: Sometime in the future.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Russ Whitfield

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

It wouldn't have surprised me if this movie would have been better without Chuck Norris. With the Chuck Norris joke meme, people appear to have forgotten that he's only ever actually been in one decent film... in which he loses to Bruce Lee. The rest of his filmography is cringe-worthy direct to DVD quality crap.

Amen. How the hell did he manage to get put up there with Arnie and Sly?

What!?! You've clearly never seen "Invasion US-Chuck", "Lone Wolf McChuck", "Chuck in Action (I, II AND III)" and "Delta Chuck" (1 AND 2). "Delta Chuck 1" deserves a special mention because its actually two films in one.

Force of Chuck.
The OctoChuck...

He's the action gift of the 70s/80s that kept on giving.

Are they good films or "so bad they're good films"? I know lots of hipster wankers might "ironically" enjoy Stallone and Arnie but they both made genuinely excellent action films!

Nice. Btw you are aware that you can make multiple points in a single post right?

Stallone and Arnie did indeed make some cracking action films in their heyday but surely "ironically" is the only way you can enjoy Chuck's contribution to the movie world. Everything I've seen of his (apart from his beatdown in WotD) is genuinely shit. That goes for his films and TV series alike. In fact the only worthwhile contribution Walker Texas Ranger gave to this world is to set up a mildly funny gag in a second rate Will Ferrell film.

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Post #: 160

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 1:27:15 PM

Qwerty Norris

Posts: 3218
Joined: 26/10/2005
From: Edinburgh

Well I enjoyed it.

It's total shite...but I enjoyed it.

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1. Zero Dark Thirty
2. No
3. A Hijacking
4. In The Fog
5. Good Vibrations
6. McCullin
7. Beyond the Hills
8. The Place Beyond the Pines
9. Wreck-it Ralph
10. Shell

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Post #: 161

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 2:26:31 PM

jonson

Posts: 8104
Joined: 30/9/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: Qwerty Norris

Well I enjoyed it.

It's total shite...but I enjoyed it.

Hooray, a review!!!!

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Post #: 162

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 2:41:27 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: Qwerty Norris

Well I enjoyed it.

It's total shite...but I enjoyed it.

They should put that on the poster

(in reply to Qwerty Norris)

Post #: 163

RE: Um... - 17/8/2012 2:45:34 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harry Tuttle

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Russ Whitfield

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

It wouldn't have surprised me if this movie would have been better without Chuck Norris. With the Chuck Norris joke meme, people appear to have forgotten that he's only ever actually been in one decent film... in which he loses to Bruce Lee. The rest of his filmography is cringe-worthy direct to DVD quality crap.

Amen. How the hell did he manage to get put up there with Arnie and Sly?

What!?! You've clearly never seen "Invasion US-Chuck", "Lone Wolf McChuck", "Chuck in Action (I, II AND III)" and "Delta Chuck" (1 AND 2). "Delta Chuck 1" deserves a special mention because its actually two films in one.

Force of Chuck.
The OctoChuck...

He's the action gift of the 70s/80s that kept on giving.

Are they good films or "so bad they're good films"? I know lots of hipster wankers might "ironically" enjoy Stallone and Arnie but they both made genuinely excellent action films!

Nice. Btw you are aware that you can make multiple points in a single post right?

Stallone and Arnie did indeed make some cracking action films in their heyday but surely "ironically" is the only way you can enjoy Chuck's contribution to the movie world. Everything I've seen of his (apart from his beatdown in WotD) is genuinely shit. That goes for his films and TV series alike. In fact the only worthwhile contribution Walker Texas Ranger gave to this world is to set up a mildly funny gag in a second rate Will Ferrell film.

To paraphrase Nixon on Eisenhower: I meant "hipster wankers" in the very best sense of the word

Some of my best friends have fixie bikes and sailor tats!

Thanks for that, sounds like I'm not missing much, Chuck wise. I have read some of political writings.

(in reply to Harry Tuttle)

Post #: 164

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 3:31:10 PM

Russ Whitfield

Posts: 425
Joined: 10/4/2012

thanks for the spoiler warning there, mate.

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Post #: 165

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 3:35:01 PM

elab49

Posts: 52009
Joined: 1/10/2005

This is a review thread - if you're in here you should anticipate often quite detailed discussion of the film. Which is why we recommend you watch the film before reading the thread - or only read threads for films you won't be going out of your way to see.

I'm quite safe in here then

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Post #: 166

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 3:43:37 PM

UTB

Posts: 9041
Joined: 30/9/2005

quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49

we recommend you watch the film before reading the thread

HAHAHAHA good one elab

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Post #: 167

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 3:51:16 PM

Russ Whitfield

Posts: 425
Joined: 10/4/2012

Its common courtesy to put a spoiler warning. Other people have mentioned it before on the thread - I think actually on the previous page.

Anyway, cheers.

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Post #: 168

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 4:53:57 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: UTB

quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49

we recommend you watch the film before reading the thread

HAHAHAHA good one elab

I was wondering if the Citizen Kane review thread has people using inviso text when referring to his sled.

(in reply to UTB)

Post #: 169

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 6:26:09 PM

AxlReznor

Posts: 1095
Joined: 2/12/2010
From: Great Britain

quote:

ORIGINAL: colinnaraine

I saw this film yesterday and agree it's not an arthouse movie by any means but it is a fun action piece that I feel suffers for having to be so short. Yes, it feels disjointed at times � i refere to the scenes which force us to acknowledge that the guys are funny, and the scenes between action feels longer too, but we knew before sitting down that this was not a serious picture with a thought-provoking plot. This simply is an action porn flick. (hey, have I created a new genre!) I feel the film is for 40+ years olds, you know those who obviously grew up watching all those action non-CGI 80s flicks.

I couldn�t help smiling and sitting forward when you had the Willis/Stallone/Schwarzenegger actions scenes. JCVD was the star is the film and he scene-steals the show in the way he kills Hemsworth in a truly original fashion. The fight scene with Stallone/JCVD was savage and is amongst the best. Not enough Jet Li in this one although he delivers at full throttle in opening moments. Obviously not enough Schwarzenegger but I am hopeful for the future. Statham in the church was sheer Baryshnikov. Crewes should have been given more funny lines as he can deliver them much better. Look forward to an extended cut. This is what the first film should have been like.

I wanted to see Dolph Lundgren say to JCVD (�Don�t I know you?�) in reference to �Universal Soldier�. Yeah I know it�s silly but it wouldn�t have been out of place with some of the other dialogue.

Could not understand the use of Fistful of Dollars music when introducing Chuck Norris�s scene (especially when Clint Eastwood is being approached for the 3rd movie) Also while on the subject, Nicholas Cage and Mickey Rourke are both in the 3rd film and Harrison Ford and Wesley Snipes (Demolition Man) are also in talks.

I personally want to see Mel Gibson (Lethal Weapon) in the 3rd film along with Jackie Chan and Clint Eastwood and, if

Don't think so... I've heard Tony Jaa's movies referred to as 'action porn' before now. Now if they can come up with an action sequence to match the done-in-one multi-storey restaurant fight from Warrior King, I would be impressed.

I know I've had to be warned about this before, but spoiler warnings, please? That said, I'll probably be disappointed with this if there's really not that much Jet Li in it. Not sure why they'd sideline one of the only guys to actually be able to do the kind of stuff most of the rest of the cast only pretend to (Jason Statham and JCVD notwithstanding). Oh well...

P.S. I think we all know who Mel Gibson is... no need for the Lethal Weapon in parentheses.

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Post #: 170

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 6:27:55 PM

AxlReznor

Posts: 1095
Joined: 2/12/2010
From: Great Britain

quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49

This is a review thread - if you're in here you should anticipate often quite detailed discussion of the film. Which is why we recommend you watch the film before reading the thread - or only read threads for films you won't be going out of your way to see.

I'm quite safe in here then

It was you who reminded me about spoiler warnings the other day.

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Post #: 171

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 6:29:24 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

P.S. I think we all know who Mel Gibson is... no need for the Lethal Weapon in parentheses.

Antisemitic drunkard director of pish films?

(in reply to AxlReznor)

Post #: 172

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 6:31:34 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

quote:

ORIGINAL: elab49

This is a review thread - if you're in here you should anticipate often quite detailed discussion of the film. Which is why we recommend you watch the film before reading the thread - or only read threads for films you won't be going out of your way to see.

I'm quite safe in here then

It was you who reminded me about spoiler warnings the other day.

Personally I consider the revelation that Expendables 2 even has a plot to be something of a "spoiler".

(in reply to AxlReznor)

Post #: 173

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 6:36:09 PM

AxlReznor

Posts: 1095
Joined: 2/12/2010
From: Great Britain

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

P.S. I think we all know who Mel Gibson is... no need for the Lethal Weapon in parentheses.

Antisemitic drunkard director of pish films?

Don't forget misogynist!

For the record, I actually like some of Mel Gibson's films... it's just a shame that admitting that makes me feel all dirty nowadays.

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Post #: 174

RE: Couldn't help smiling - 17/8/2012 6:41:11 PM

cerebusboy

Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/5/2006

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

quote:

ORIGINAL: cerebusboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: AxlReznor

P.S. I think we all know who Mel Gibson is... no need for the Lethal Weapon in parentheses.

Antisemitic drunkard director of pish films?

Don't forget misogynist!

For the record, I actually like some of Mel Gibson's films... it's just a shame that admitting that makes me feel all dirty nowadays.

I loved some of the films he's been in I remember when the first revelations came out I thought, looking on the bright side, that now we'd at least get a career-saving Lethal Weapon 5. But now it's too late

That said, Frankie Boyle's "everybody said Mel Gibson couldn't make play a convincing Scotsman - but look at him now, an alcoholic racist!" always cracks me up

Maybe they could get Danny Glover and Chris Rock in Expendables 3! (I'd watch it) Although surely the Rock should be top of the wishlist? Or how about a cross over with that other great action movie - D.O.A: Dead or Alive?

(in reply to AxlReznor)

Post #: 175

RE: The Expendables 2 - 18/8/2012 9:46:55 AM

captainrentboy

Posts: 679
Joined: 16/3/2008
From: South Wales

'Haaa, it's really old saggy actors spouting lines they used to say when they were young and relevant in cinema, but now they're delivered with the mighty gusto of a slightly decrepid 70yr old, so it's all kind of depressing..'
If those classic moments and some pretty underwhelming action sequences (complete with CG blood splatters, yeay!!) are all you need from a film, then God damn you'll love Expendables 2.
Me? Sadly I was pretty facking bored for 80% of the runtime. And It's not that I don't like straight to DVD garbage either, I love 'zero plot' flicks like Undisputed 2&3, NInja, Blood and Bone and the last Universal Soldier. But for some reason this, with its far higher budget and supposedly better director/actors, was kind of dull compared to those 80s-esque action movies.
2/5 - The opening 10mins had its moments, as did the closing 10, ohh and Lundgren is still pretty cool! :)

< Message edited by captainrentboy -- 18/8/2012 9:57:55 AM >

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Post #: 176

RE: The Expendables 2 - 18/8/2012 9:55:21 AM

Wild about Wilder

Posts: 1505
Joined: 9/4/2010
From: Hertfordshire

Should've heard Mayo &the other 2 Stooges (Floyd & Boyd) standing in for Kermode slagging it off acting like it was beneath them, Kermode may be a bit of an arse but at least he admits that he likes "THE STATH!" not these 3.
WHAT A BUNCH OF FUCKING SNOBS!

< Message edited by Wild about Wilder -- 18/8/2012 9:56:35 AM >

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Post #: 177

RE: The Expendables 2 - 18/8/2012 10:03:13 AM

rawlinson

Posts: 40599
Joined: 13/6/2008
From: Timbuktu. Chinese or Fictional.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wild about Wilder

Should've heard Mayo &the other 2 Stooges (Floyd & Boyd) standing in for Kermode slagging it off acting like it was beneath them, Kermode may be a bit of an arse but at least he admits that he likes "THE STATH!" not these 3.
WHAT A BUNCH OF FUCKING SNOBS!

So people aren't allowed to dislike Expendables 2 or Jason Statham without being snobs?

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quote:

ORIGINAL: matty_b

I would plough my way through MonsterCat

quote:

ORIGINAL: matty_b

I desire MonsterCat to go down on me.

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Post #: 178

RE: The Expendables 2 - 18/8/2012 10:29:38 AM

MonsterCat

Posts: 6393
Joined: 24/3/2011
From: St. Albans, Hertfordshire

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wild about Wilder

Should've heard Mayo &the other 2 Stooges (Floyd & Boyd) standing in for Kermode slagging it off acting like it was beneath them, Kermode may be a bit of an arse but at least he admits that he likes "THE STATH!" not these 3.
WHAT A BUNCH OF FUCKING SNOBS!

I thought the first film was a load of boring, cynical, muddled nonsense and not even Statham couldn't save it. Does that make me a snob, too?

They're not snobs. And that goes doubly for Nigel Floyd who is deeply into trashy exploitation cinema.

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Post #: 179

RE: The Expendables 2 - 18/8/2012 10:39:22 AM

rawlinson

Posts: 40599
Joined: 13/6/2008
From: Timbuktu. Chinese or Fictional.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MonsterCat

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wild about Wilder

Should've heard Mayo &the other 2 Stooges (Floyd & Boyd) standing in for Kermode slagging it off acting like it was beneath them, Kermode may be a bit of an arse but at least he admits that he likes "THE STATH!" not these 3.
WHAT A BUNCH OF FUCKING SNOBS!

I thought the first film was a load of boring, cynical, muddled nonsense and not even Statham couldn't save it. Does that make me a snob, too?

They're not snobs. And that goes doubly for Nigel Floyd who is deeply into trashy exploitation cinema.

I'm actually listening to the podcast right now

One of them doesn't mind the film but feels there's far too many in-jokes.
One of them likes the second half, but finds the first part boring, thinks the second half is perfect for the target audience.
One of them hated it

All of them mock the legal documents they had to sign for the embargo, especially the part about them not being able to discuss the film in a lift. The harshest comments are about the embargo.

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