chris kilby
Posts: 1189
Joined: 31/3/2010
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Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How tall are you, private? Private Cowboy: Sir, five-foot-nine, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Five-foot-nine, Jesus Christ, I didn't know they stacked shit that high! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What's your excuse? Private Cowboy: Sir, excuse for what, sir? Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I'm asking the fucking questions here, private! Do you understand? Private Cowboy: Sir, yes, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Well, thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while? Private Cowboy: Sir, yes, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you shook up? Are you nervous? Private Cowboy: Sir, I am, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Do I make you nervous? Private Cowboy: Sir? Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: "Sir" what? Were you about to call me an asshole? Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Where the hell are you from anyway, private? Private Cowboy: Sir, Texas, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Holy dog shit! Texas? Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy, and you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down. Do you suck dicks? Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you a peter puffer? Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I bet you're the kind of guy who would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What is your major malfunction, numbnuts? Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bullshit. It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Who's the slimy little communist shit, twinkle-toed cocksucker down here who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh? The fairy fucking godmother said it. Out-fucking-standing! I will PT you all until you fucking die! I'll PT you until your assholes are sucking buttermilk! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Was it you, you scroungy little fuck, huh? Private Cowboy: Sir, no Sir! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: You little piece of shit! You look like a fucking worm! I bet it was you! Private Cowboy: Sir, no Sir! Private Joker: Sir, I said it, Sir! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Well, no shit. What have we got here, a fucking comedian? Private Joker. I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you, you can come over to my house and fuck my sister! (Full Metal Jacket)
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