dreddhead123
Posts: 282
Joined: 23/7/2010
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I did a review of Alex Garland's screenplay in 2010. Here it is - I'll remove any spoiler bits: Alex Garland, screenwriter of such classics as 'The Margate Beach', 'Sunshine On A Cloudy Day' and the acclaimed thriller novel 'I Murdered Myself And Got Away With It' has been commissioned with the task of writing a new Judge Dredd screenplay. The (leaked) screenplay starts with Dredd - now referred to as a responder - chasing after some perps, or rather, 'fucking' perps. In this vision of the future perps still swear the old fashioned way. Garland must think drokk, grud, stomm, poopyface and willywarmer are too silly because he does not mention them. Personally, I loved the old days in 2000AD when Dredd faced up to a perp, his lawgiver raised, eager for the kill, and said in his inimitable way: "I am the law, poopyface!" Sadly, Garland doesn't see it like that. After a brief shootout Dredd pins down his perp, eager to sentence him. Dredd finds the perp guilty of stealing the limelight; after all, this story is called 'Judge Dredd' so why should some perp get most of the early screentime in the film, and he duly executes him on the spot. Garland makes it clear - Dredd is the star of this film and woe betide any supporting character with one line of dialogue ever trying to steal a scene. The story continues with SPOILER DETAIL GONE Psi Judge Anderson. She's a rookie Judge, beautifully looking and a mutant. Apparently in the future all beautiful young women are mutants, Lord knows how ugly the normal women must be. Dredd meets Anderson and you sense Garland is establishing some sexual tension between the two characters. Anderson's low zipped top is Garland trying to elicit a sexual response so it's no surprise when Dredd starts fondling his daystick and then asks if he can leave the room. Later, Dredd and Anderson investigate a SPOILER DETAIL GONE at Peach Tree Block. This is a block full of peach trees. Garland is keen to tell us that even though Mega-City 1 is a violent, depressing world you can always rely on blocks full of peach trees. I don't know about you but I find that reassuring to know. Inside Peach Tree they discover Ma-Ma is in charge. She's an old hooker with a silly sounding name. Apparently Garland's original name for the villain was 'Fanny - Mistress of the Night' but this was deemed too sophisticated for the target film audience. The plot thickens as Dredd discovers all is not what it seems in Peach Tree Block. The SPOILER DETAIL REMOVED.The gang are loyal to Ma-ma even though they giggle behind her back and call her "Ma Ma Mia." SPOILER DETAIL REMOVED. Slo-mo is a SPOILER DETAIL REMOVED that slows down time and is based on the two words: 'slow' and 'motion'. It should not be confused with the term bullet time that slows down time. Slo-mo slows down time in an Alex Garland screenplay whereas bullet time slows down time in any screenplay not written by Alex Garland. So no similarity whatsoever. The rest of screenplay concerns Ma-Ma taking on Dredd and Anderson in a series of action scenes which bear a remarkable resemblance to the 1988 film Die Hard. It's clear Alex Garland is a fan of that popular action film. In one particular scene Garland is keen to pay homage to the film when Dredd says "yippie kai-yay motherfucker!" and then sentences himself to community service for needless profanity in a public place. There is no doubt the screenplay seems less like Judge Dredd and more like Dredd Hard. In a storyline so bereft of imagination and invention you wonder if the writer has ever read a 2000AD Dredd strip. If he did it must have been one by Garth Ennis. This is not to say the screenplay is totally without merit. Garland does give us explosive action. I am reminded of the scene at the end where Dredd forces a small nuclear missile up Ma-Ma's anal passage. The resultant blast wipes out most of the block, killing thousands of cits and destroying hundreds of lovely peach trees. Anderson's remark "don't you think that was a bit excessive?" is wonderfully countered by Dredd's reply, "you think this is bad, wait until you see the sequel!" Judge Dredd by Alex Garland is a missed opportunity and gets 4 dud lawgiver rounds out of 10.
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