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RE: ASK DAZ!!

 
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RE: ASK DAZ!! - 25/4/2011 5:14:46 PM   
Rgirvan44


Posts: 19049
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Punishment Park
That is code for me. 

_____________________________

It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to, than I have ever known.


(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 91
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 25/4/2011 5:17:19 PM   
Hood_Man


Posts: 12151
Joined: 30/9/2005
Dear Daz,

If you wouldn't mind, could you sit with me for a few hours while I tell you about God?

Sincerely,

Hood

(in reply to Rgirvan44)
Post #: 92
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 25/4/2011 5:17:29 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spaldron

Dear Daz,

Its a nice day so should I go out and get some fresh air and sunshine or should I stay in and do fuck all?


Go out and get some fresh air before dinner. Unless you have some cinematic awesome to watch on DVD?

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Spaldron)
Post #: 93
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 25/4/2011 5:18:53 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hood_Man

Dear Daz,

If you wouldn't mind, could you sit with me for a few hours while I tell you about God?

Sincerely,

Hood


What can you tell me about me that I don't already know?


< Message edited by DazDaMan -- 25/4/2011 5:23:26 PM >


_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Hood_Man)
Post #: 94
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 25/4/2011 5:23:11 PM   
Spaldron


Posts: 10485
Joined: 6/10/2006
From: Chair
Dear Daz,

Why is Actors And Auteur's turning into a "lets perv at young actresses" forum?

_____________________________

And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts
And I looked and behold, a pale horse
And his name that sat on him was Death
And Hell followed with him.

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 95
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 25/4/2011 5:27:39 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
I dunno, I haven't been on that forum for a long while. As red-blooded a man as I am, I'm not likely to sit there gawping at them.

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Spaldron)
Post #: 96
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 9:45:06 AM   
Snake-Eyes


Posts: 9970
Joined: 1/10/2005
From: ZONE 2
Dear Daz -
 
Your favourite film of all time is JAWS (I'm guessing!) What's the single WORST film you've ever been subjected to?

_____________________________

"When you have to shoot, shoot don't talk."

http://www.expendablespremiere.com/index.html

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 97
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 2:30:13 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole

quote:

ORIGINAL: Snake-Eyes

Dear Daz -
 
Your favourite film of all time is JAWS (I'm guessing!) What's the single WORST film you've ever been subjected to?


Hmm. I have quite a list of shit films, but the shittest of the shit is a bit hard to pin down, as they're all shit for different shitty reasons.

The past six months have seen TWO unbelievable shit films, however:

Unstoppable
SO, SO much promise in this title - a fucking big train, out of control, smashing a path through America, taking out schoolkids left, right and centre. But no. No big crashes, and they stop the fucking thing. Granted, the best single thing about it is DENZEL WASHINGTON, and he could stop a speeding train with just a squeaky fart, but apart from that?? Nothing.

Sucker Punch
Sorry, but this was simply fucking DIRE!! I like some of Zack Snyder's previous output (Dawn of the Dead, 300) but this is just style over substance, and it doesn't even do that properly. It's a Katie Price film - in other words, it might occasionally look half-decent, but you have to wonder what the fucking point is!!!

There are others, but these are two recent films which I have paid good money for and immediately wished I hadn't.

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Snake-Eyes)
Post #: 98
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 2:34:59 PM   
vad3r


Posts: 4403
Joined: 3/9/2010
From: Close to Mod HQ
The Horse Whisperer or Seabiscuit?

_____________________________

Single Virgin Mod Candidate 2013


quote:

ORIGINAL: horribleives
To paraphrase the great man himself:

Vad3r won't go anywhere near this.

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 99
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 2:44:39 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
Seabiscuit.

The film adaptation of The Horse Whisperer takes too many liberties with its source material - not least the casting of the main character (Robert Redford was about 60 when the film came out - Tom Booker is only in his 40s!). The film ends quite short of the novel, too - SPOIILERS - Tom Booker dies while trying to rescue Grace (Scarlett Johanssen) when she takes off after finding out about her mother's affair - SPOILERS END.

However, in saying that, both films are good for various reasons - cinematically speaking, The Horse Whisperer captures the beauty and majesty of Montana's environment fantastically, and also introduced Intelligent Horsemanship to the masses (or at least the idea of it). Seabiscuit presents a rousing underdog story which, for the most part, is true to real life events. It has great performances all round, is very emotional (if you don't cry when The Biscuit runs his last race, there's something wrong with you!) and is not too schmaltzy.

Having said that, Champions beats them both hands down. It doesn't fanny about, it presents the bare facts of the story without watering them down, and sticks to historic fact as far as it was possible. Not only that, but the horse protagonist of the film is played by.... HIMSELF! You can't really get much more historically accurate than that!

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to vad3r)
Post #: 100
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 2:53:20 PM   
vad3r


Posts: 4403
Joined: 3/9/2010
From: Close to Mod HQ
Dear Chris Hewitt,

How much would it cost to buy this horse:






_____________________________

Single Virgin Mod Candidate 2013


quote:

ORIGINAL: horribleives
To paraphrase the great man himself:

Vad3r won't go anywhere near this.

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 101
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 2:57:44 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
Depends. What's its background? Pedigree? Training history?

It looks like an Arab, so a good one of those will set you back a few grand...

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to vad3r)
Post #: 102
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 3:00:52 PM   
vad3r


Posts: 4403
Joined: 3/9/2010
From: Close to Mod HQ
No idea what kind it is, just typed sexy horse on Google.

_____________________________

Single Virgin Mod Candidate 2013


quote:

ORIGINAL: horribleives
To paraphrase the great man himself:

Vad3r won't go anywhere near this.

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 103
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 3:10:01 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
I wouldn't buy an Arab, anyway. Nothing wrong with them, but they're a bit too fine for me - and a bit fiery!

This:


A Clydesdale. Much more like it.

In fact:




_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to vad3r)
Post #: 104
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 5:53:18 PM   
sanchia


Posts: 18135
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Norwich
Dear Daz

Slice them up or cut them down. It is so confusing.

_____________________________

Nothing to see here.



(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 105
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 5:59:27 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
Depends what we're talking about. I would say cut them down....

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to sanchia)
Post #: 106
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 7:20:04 PM   
Spaldron


Posts: 10485
Joined: 6/10/2006
From: Chair
Dear Daz,

Why did my Empire account go all nuts last night and I couldn't log on, did you have something to do with it? (I bet you did you sneaky f***er, it was you and swords right!)


_____________________________

And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts
And I looked and behold, a pale horse
And his name that sat on him was Death
And Hell followed with him.

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 107
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 7:21:57 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
Not me, I was watching porn. It probably was Swords, though.

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Spaldron)
Post #: 108
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 7:29:58 PM   
theoriginalcynic

 

Posts: 6521
Joined: 10/4/2007
Dear Daz,

Have you stolen my socks?

Cynic

Edited to say Bazinga.


< Message edited by theoriginalcynic -- 26/4/2011 7:30:32 PM >

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 109
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 26/4/2011 7:35:20 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
I am not in the sock-thieving business, so I would have to say no, not on this occasion...

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to theoriginalcynic)
Post #: 110
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 12:30:47 AM   
vad3r


Posts: 4403
Joined: 3/9/2010
From: Close to Mod HQ
Dear Daz,

_____________________________

Single Virgin Mod Candidate 2013


quote:

ORIGINAL: horribleives
To paraphrase the great man himself:

Vad3r won't go anywhere near this.

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 111
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 6:25:15 AM   
Snake-Eyes


Posts: 9970
Joined: 1/10/2005
From: ZONE 2
Daz -
 
1. What's your Favourite Sly Stallone Movie?
 
2. Would you be so kind as to 'Ask Snake-Eyes' a new question?
 
Cheers!

_____________________________

"When you have to shoot, shoot don't talk."

http://www.expendablespremiere.com/index.html

(in reply to vad3r)
Post #: 112
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 6:48:42 AM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole

quote:

ORIGINAL: Snake-Eyes

Daz -
 
1. What's your Favourite Sly Stallone Movie?
 
2. Would you be so kind as to 'Ask Snake-Eyes' a new question?
 
Cheers!


Dearest Snake

1) Good question. While the first chapter of the Rambo franchise is, by all accounts, excellent fare, I actually prefer the blood and thunder of Rambo IV! Yes, I went there. It's a solid action movie, the likes of which hasn't really been seen since the heyday of action movie heroes. But, it's also got a pretty serious tone about it that I think people kind of dismiss because "it's a Rambo movie".

2) I shall think of something suitable to ask you!

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Snake-Eyes)
Post #: 113
ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 7:28:54 AM   
Snake-Eyes


Posts: 9970
Joined: 1/10/2005
From: ZONE 2
Dear Daz (a.k.a. Chairman of Scottish Snake-Eyes Enterprises),
 
The very thought of speaking of a JAWS remake is, of course, punishable by Death. But IF you had to choose a director and recast the three main leads....?


(btw, RAMBO IV is f**king AWESOME ain't it?)


< Message edited by Snake-Eyes -- 27/4/2011 7:36:17 AM >


_____________________________

"When you have to shoot, shoot don't talk."

http://www.expendablespremiere.com/index.html

(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 114
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 11:59:04 AM   
theoriginalcynic

 

Posts: 6521
Joined: 10/4/2007
Dear Daz,

Have you stolen my slippers?

Cynic


(in reply to Snake-Eyes)
Post #: 115
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 12:26:29 PM   
simonmckergan1


Posts: 1266
Joined: 8/11/2005
From: Belfast
Dear Daz,

As a massive Jaws fan, which actor do you think nailed the character of Mike Brody the best?



or



or is it this guy?


or this little fella?



_____________________________

As you can see, my young apprentice, your friends have failed. Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL battle station!

(in reply to theoriginalcynic)
Post #: 116
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 5:15:46 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
quote:

ORIGINAL: Snake-Eyes

Dear Daz (a.k.a. Chairman of Scottish Snake-Eyes Enterprises),
 
The very thought of speaking of a JAWS remake is, of course, punishable by Death. But IF you had to choose a director and recast the three main leads....?


(btw, RAMBO IV is f**king AWESOME ain't it?)



Oooooh, you evil sod!

It's a hard question to answer adequately. Strictly speaking, The Berg wasn't the master of his craft that he is now when he directed JAWS, but I wouldn't really want some hack taking a stab at the idea, either! A safe bet might be The Coens - I get the feeling they'd do Benchley's book and characters justice without fucking it up royally.

As for the leads....? Jeff Bridges was great in the role of Rooster Cogburn, so my gut feeling would be to go with The Dude for the role of Quint.

Hooper - maybe Matt Damon? I can see it, personally.

As for the coveted role of Brody...? Well, Adrian Brody might not be too bad.

I'm gonna duck for cover now...!

And yeah, Rambo IV is utterly wicked!

< Message edited by DazDaMan -- 27/4/2011 5:16:18 PM >


_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to Snake-Eyes)
Post #: 117
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 5:18:41 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole

quote:

ORIGINAL: simonmckergan1

Dear Daz,

As a massive Jaws fan, which actor do you think nailed the character of Mike Brody the best?



or



or is it this guy?


or this little fella?




My personal favourite out of the four is actually Lance Guest! I should really say Mark Gruner (Jaws 2) as I have him as a friend on Facebook, though, but Lance Guest was quite good in the role.

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to simonmckergan1)
Post #: 118
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 6:34:16 PM   
sanchia


Posts: 18135
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Norwich
Dear Daz,

Revenge. Best served cold or fiery hot with a side of bloodlust?



_____________________________

Nothing to see here.



(in reply to DazDaMan)
Post #: 119
RE: ASK DAZ!! - 27/4/2011 6:36:27 PM   
DazDaMan


Posts: 10109
Joined: 8/9/2006
From: Penicuik - a right shithole
The Klingons might tell you it's a dish best served cold, but I reckon red hot fire and brimstone, with a spot of evisceration and dismemberment, is definitely the way to go!

_____________________________

You fucking fuckers are gonna do what I say or I'm going to stick my foot so far up your assholes you'll rue the day you crawled out of your mother's twat!

(in reply to sanchia)
Post #: 120
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