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Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:14:46 AM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
 In my many hours spent reading film criticism, I don't think I've ever come across a 'critic' more obnoxious, ignorant and irritating than Dan Schneider, self-proclaimed dominator of the 'cultural internet' or some such thing. I want everyone here to read through his reviews and pick his ten worst. You shall see why he deserves it.

Here's one for F for Fake where he admits to having a wet dream over Oja Kodar:
http://www.cosmoetica.com/B464-DES397.htm

His blog:
http://cinemension.blogspot.com/

His site:
www.cosmoetica.com

And this review where he claims to be a better critic than Rivette:
http://unspokencinema.blogspot.com/2007/04/dvd-review-of-gertrud.html

This one where he also makes some wonderfully out-there comments in the comment section:
http://www.altfg.com/blog/film-reviews/breathless-jean-luc-godard/

This one because he seems to dislike Cocteau based purely on the fact he's a successful poet and Danny isn't (and how he wishes to be):
http://www.altfg.com/blog/film-reviews/jean-cocteaus-le-sang-dun-poete-the-blood-of-a-poet-1930-dvd-review/

http://www.altfg.com/blog/film-reviews/blue-krzysztof-kieslowski-juliette-binoche/ features this:

quote:


Nonetheless this detraction is only in regards to the DVD package's extras, not the brilliant film itself, although Miramax really should have offered dubbed versions of the films, for film is a visual medium, and reading subtitles always detracts from a first viewing.


This one is where he states that The Third Man was actually directed by Orson Welles based on no evidence whatsoever:
http://www.altfg.com/blog/film-reviews/the-fallen-idol-carol-reed-ralph-richardson/

And while I also dislike Dark Knight, this is one hell of a review:
http://blogcritics.org/video/article/dvd-review-the-dark-knight/

< Message edited by jamesbondguy -- 30/7/2009 1:34:29 AM >


_____________________________

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quote:

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Post #: 1
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:20:29 AM   
Rhubarb


Posts: 17091
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: No Direction Home
Blue. Dubbed.

_____________________________

Über-Graecus Honoris Gratia

"Shame you won't be there to see me, shaking hands with Charles de Gaulle"

quote:

ORIGINAL: hiptobesquare_x

And don't even get me started on referring to Breathless as "a failed satire". I bet his mum looks at him and feels he's a failed example of procreation.


(in reply to jamesbondguy)
Post #: 2
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:22:30 AM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
This is still my favourite:

quote:


But don’t be embarrassed if you find that you’ve soiled yourself in the morning dreaming of Ms. Kodar. After all, there is a very good reason Welles has her beauteous form in the film, and you know that you’re only lying to yourself if you deny it.


It's possibly the most horrible thing I've ever read in a review.

_____________________________

Sitting By The Riverside...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Epiphany Demon
and it IS SHITTTT. SIBERian russia can go eat craob penis



(in reply to Rhubarb)
Post #: 3
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:26:16 AM   
Rhubarb


Posts: 17091
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: No Direction Home
quote:

Michael Bay Is Not the Death of Cinema

There, I said it. Given the recent critical backlash surrounding Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, a film which I’ll probably never see, I think it’s time to straighten things out.





_____________________________

Über-Graecus Honoris Gratia

"Shame you won't be there to see me, shaking hands with Charles de Gaulle"

quote:

ORIGINAL: hiptobesquare_x

And don't even get me started on referring to Breathless as "a failed satire". I bet his mum looks at him and feels he's a failed example of procreation.


(in reply to jamesbondguy)
Post #: 4
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:27:12 AM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
Haha. I think I've read some of this guy's stuff. He used to write for TSPDT until they stopped using him because he wrote stuff like this about Vertigo on their site: http://www.noripcord.com/reviews/film/vertigo .

Ugh.

< Message edited by TheManWithNoShame -- 30/7/2009 1:35:09 AM >


_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to Rhubarb)
Post #: 5
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:27:28 AM   
Rhubarb


Posts: 17091
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: No Direction Home
Although by linking us, you have improved his pageviews, sadly.

_____________________________

Über-Graecus Honoris Gratia

"Shame you won't be there to see me, shaking hands with Charles de Gaulle"

quote:

ORIGINAL: hiptobesquare_x

And don't even get me started on referring to Breathless as "a failed satire". I bet his mum looks at him and feels he's a failed example of procreation.


(in reply to Rhubarb)
Post #: 6
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:28:58 AM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
quote:


"That's why I'm a great critic, and Rivette shd stick to a medium he knows, and leave the writing for the pros."


Wow.

_____________________________

Sitting By The Riverside...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Epiphany Demon
and it IS SHITTTT. SIBERian russia can go eat craob penis



(in reply to Rhubarb)
Post #: 7
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:30:15 AM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rhubarb

Although by linking us, you have improved his pageviews, sadly.


DAMN YOU KGB!

I just googled him and found this: http://www.cosmoetica.com/B30-DES11.htm .It's fantastic. Absolutely fantastic.

edit*Actually not related to films but still utterly brilliant.


_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to Rhubarb)
Post #: 8
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:34:41 AM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheManWithNoShame

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rhubarb

Although by linking us, you have improved his pageviews, sadly.


DAMN YOU KGB!

I just googled him and found this: http://www.cosmoetica.com/B30-DES11.htm .It's fantastic. Absolutely fantastic.

edit*Actually not related to films but still utterly brilliant.



This is fucking awful poetry:

quote:


A beauty circumvents that which beguiles.
Swarmed, such creature's willful sounded plight
frees into moth, substance of the spiral.


That's barely up to the standard of a pretentious secondary-school student. Fair enough pimping your wife's poetry- but claiming she's better than Dylan Thomas?!

< Message edited by jamesbondguy -- 30/7/2009 1:35:04 AM >


_____________________________

Sitting By The Riverside...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Epiphany Demon
and it IS SHITTTT. SIBERian russia can go eat craob penis



(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 9
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:44:58 AM   
rawlinson


Posts: 8923
Joined: 13/6/2008
The guy's a fucking idiot. I don't liking dismissing someone's writing like that. But the man is a fucking idiot. A gibbering, raving loon who should have his computer taken away. Not just his computer, but also any pens, pencils, a speak n spell, an etch-a-sketch, any sharp instruments he could open his wrists and write in blood with and anything else that would enable this fucking idiot to express his thoughts.

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Post #: 10
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:49:41 AM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
quote:

ORIGINAL: rawlinson

The guy's a fucking idiot. I don't liking dismissing someone's writing like that. But the man is a fucking idiot. A gibbering, raving loon who should have his computer taken away. Not just his computer, but also any pens, pencils, a speak n spell, an etch-a-sketch, any sharp instruments he could open his wrists and write in blood with and anything else that would enable this fucking idiot to express his thoughts.


Have you read his stuff before, Rawl?

_____________________________

Sitting By The Riverside...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Epiphany Demon
and it IS SHITTTT. SIBERian russia can go eat craob penis



(in reply to rawlinson)
Post #: 11
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 1:51:04 AM   
rawlinson


Posts: 8923
Joined: 13/6/2008
quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesbondguy

quote:

ORIGINAL: rawlinson

The guy's a fucking idiot. I don't liking dismissing someone's writing like that. But the man is a fucking idiot. A gibbering, raving loon who should have his computer taken away. Not just his computer, but also any pens, pencils, a speak n spell, an etch-a-sketch, any sharp instruments he could open his wrists and write in blood with and anything else that would enable this fucking idiot to express his thoughts.


Have you read his stuff before, Rawl?


Possibly, I've read a lot of insane internet critics, and if he used to write for TSPDT I must have read him. But the ones you linked to are just a new level of frightening and I think the Dylan Thomas one pushed me over the edge.

_____________________________

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HoF 8 Short Term Members Wanted.

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Post #: 12
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:00:40 AM   
Pigeon Army


Posts: 8638
Joined: 29/1/2006
From: Pixar HQ, George Lucas' Office.
quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesbondguy

This one where he also makes some wonderfully out-there comments in the comment section:
http://www.altfg.com/blog/film-reviews/breathless-jean-luc-godard/



Ha! I'm reading that comments section now (I've read the review already, and I might agree with maybe one or two points if he wasn't such an insufferable jackass who always takes any good point he has and ends up fucking it up). Dan Schneider vs Mike - TWO DOUCHEBAGS WILL ENTER! ONLY ONE WILL LEAVE! WHO WILL SURVIVE - THE AFG CAVE!?! 


_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kilo_T_Mortal

Pigeon! outside! lets go you fucking youth. Me and you. Next time you come to Taiwan you're fucking arse and your arse is grass or something.


Proud President of the 'Get Carlton Banks a TV Spin-off' Association.

Film of the Week - A Serious Man (2009, Coen & Coen)

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Post #: 13
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:34:11 PM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
http://www.cosmoetica.com/DSI16.htm

Some more ammo for you there Pigeon Army.

quote:

DS: I sometimes wonder the real damage done to film by some of the really bad articles Cahiers published, much in the way I wonder of the damage done to poetry by T.S. Eliot's criticism, or to prose by the most zealous of any of the noxious schools and –isms out there. Simply put, the writing in Cahiers was bad….really bad- empurpled prose, to be generous, and the insights pseudo-profundity, hiding the utter vapidity of most of their notions. Worse, as I mentioned, their ilk kicked off the pseudo-science of film theory. Why do you think it has been so difficult to bridge the fetishistic Cahiers film theory sort of criticism with the plainspoken criticism of populist critics like a Kenneth Turan or a Roger Ebert? I'm not saying Turan nor Ebert are great critics- I think both are hit and miss; but clearly they do not need to put on airs, and even when wrong, they do not embarrass themselves with the depth of bad thought and craft that film theorists do. 

JB:  Keeping in mind that I belong to the same school of criticism that Ebert and Turan belong to, I can offer a few thoughts.  To me, quality of writing is as important in a review as quality of insight.  One can be the most thoughtful analyst but an inability to frame that analysis in a manner that is clear and comfortable makes for a failed criticism.  Ebert's strength is his ability to do this. You may disagree with him or think he has missed something, but you never finish one of his reviews scratching your head because you don't understand what the hell he was trying to say. Going back to an earlier point, I think some pretentious critics write in obscure ways not because they're trying to stroke their egos but because they don't really understand what their point is.  I can go back and read some of those old "Cahiers" articles and come away baffled.  Truth be told, when I started writing reviews, I tried to read "Cahiers," having heard it held some of the greatest film-related material ever committed to paper.  I gave up pretty quickly. 

DS: The Cahiers folk, naturally, raved over the French New Wave- especially Jean-Luc Godard, yet in the few films of his that I've seen he's a palpably mediocre (at best) director. I mean, I grew up watching Jimmy Cagney and John Garfield films with my dad, and Breathless is pure imitation, with much bad technique, a bad screenplay, and poorly technically made. It is not homage, but failed satire, if anything. Yet, there are few critics in any field willing to point out even manifest things, such as the lack of Emperor's clothes. There's simply no comparing Godard with Bergman, technically, dramatically, nor in any measurable form; at least not in the Frenchman's 1960s work, which I've seen. Do you agree with this assessment of the Cahiers crowd, and about –isms, in general; that they tend to be conformist and do a disservice to criticism and the art form?  

JB:  There are some Bergman films I don't like, but he's an honest filmmaker and some of his movies are in my personal Top 200.  I'm not a fan of Godard, and his self-importance makes him even less appealing to me. It comes across on screen and in his interviews.  He sneers at those he deems to be "lesser" filmmakers and has an almost godlike view of his work.  I don't want to dismiss the French New Wave entirely, but its importance in film is more negative than positive.  It has given rise to a school of filmmaking that produces unwatchable crap.  By the way, Godard has gotten WORSE since his early films.  His latest productions are unbearable.  Yet people watch his movies and praise them because he's Godard and he's an icon.  The Emperor's new clothes, exactly.  

DS: Let me end this digression on Rivette, the New Wave, and film theory, with one final quote I made from that argument:
'Purple prose is bad, be it in crit or creative writing. It is self-indulgent and puerile, and it places the artist, or writer, above the written word and reader. Esp. as a critic, the reader MUST be informed. Too many MFA type writers these days write for themselves or their few colleagues, thus the proliferation of segregated schools of art or crit.' Manifestly, I think that describes the Cahiers du Cinema crowd to a T. These were critics who tried to place their own egos and belief systems above the manna they were assigned to elucidate. Any comments? And, pro or con, what effect do you think the European cinema of the '40s through '60s had on the Golden Age of American cinema in the 1970s? 

JB:  American cinema in the '70s took the best of the New Wave and incorporated it into films that still emphasized story and character.  One of the best things to come out of Europe during the '40s, '50s, and '60s was a sense of daring.  That's evident in '70s American films.  Of course, part of that is because of the fall of the Hays code, which was holding back American films from expanding in interesting directions.  It's worth considering where American would have gone if that form of censorship had not fallen over the world's most influential and prolific film industry. 


Is it just me or is it suspicious when the questions in an interview are double the length of the answers?

< Message edited by TheManWithNoShame -- 30/7/2009 3:35:32 PM >


_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to Pigeon Army)
Post #: 14
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:40:20 PM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
Is that an interview that consists purely of two people with no idea what they're talking about trying to sound like they do? Everything Dan does is like a car-wreck of epic proportions. There's nothing behind their statements- explain how it's produced a school of film-making that makes unwatchable crap. Explain why you don't like Cahiers. Explain how Truffaut wrote in an obscure way despite being possibly the most lucid of all major critics?

quote:


I wonder of the damage done to poetry by T.S. Eliot’s criticism


What?

_____________________________

Sitting By The Riverside...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Epiphany Demon
and it IS SHITTTT. SIBERian russia can go eat craob penis



(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 15
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:45:04 PM   
rawlinson


Posts: 8923
Joined: 13/6/2008
That entire interview is him picking Berardinelli reviews that he disagrees with and telling him what his own reviews said. What an egomaniac.

_____________________________

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(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 16
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:51:29 PM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
quote:

ORIGINAL: rawlinson

That entire interview is him picking Berardinelli reviews that he disagrees with and telling him what his own reviews said. What an egomaniac.


Isn't Berardinelli a respected film critic? He seems to come up on RT a lot anyway. I wonder why he didn't just tell him to go fuck himself.

Also, the site says he's going to interview Ray Carney Imagine if he got Rosenbaum on there. That would be an interview/argument I'd like to read.


_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to rawlinson)
Post #: 17
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:54:57 PM   
rawlinson


Posts: 8923
Joined: 13/6/2008
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheManWithNoShame

quote:

ORIGINAL: rawlinson

That entire interview is him picking Berardinelli reviews that he disagrees with and telling him what his own reviews said. What an egomaniac.


Isn't Berardinelli a respected film critic? He seems to come up on RT a lot anyway. I wonder why he didn't just tell him to go fuck himself.


I think he's one of the RT group of Online Film Critics, so I'm not sure how respected he actually is. He certainly has a bit of a high profile though.

quote:

Imagine if he got Rosenbaum on there. That would be an interview/argument I'd like to read.


I would love for that to happen.

_____________________________

"Never call me a bully again, I'm so much worse than that."

HoF 8 Short Term Members Wanted.

http://www.empireonline.com/forum/tm.asp?m=2070807&mpage=6&key=&NID=0#2627277

(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 18
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 3:55:59 PM   
jamesbondguy


Posts: 5509
Joined: 6/1/2007
From: The Village Green
Behold! The action figure equivalent of one of Dan's reviews/ interviews! It's stupid and nonsensical:



(Actually, I just wanted to post this picture.)



_____________________________

Sitting By The Riverside...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Epiphany Demon
and it IS SHITTTT. SIBERian russia can go eat craob penis



(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 19
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 30/7/2009 4:35:10 PM   
Troilus


Posts: 14
Joined: 19/7/2009
This is his Wife's doing rather than himself (however in terms of personality and writing style and self-belief and general masturbatory delusions they're so similar that she seems to operate as just little more than an extension of himself) but this is worth seeing: http://jaschneider.blogspot.com/2009/05/plath-reincarnated.html


quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesbondguy

Behold! The action figure equivalent of one of Dan's reviews/ interviews! It's stupid and nonsensical:



(Actually, I just wanted to post this picture.)




Wrong because the written element of that is fairly concise and relevant, even if shit. To be comparable to DS it'd have to have at least 2 A4 pages worth of description, a seemingly irrelevant comparison to funhouse Ken (the 1974 limited run model) and a dig at the inferior yet more acclaimed model-making skills of those overrated cunts Mattel, and finally a brief mention of how he wanks over Mary Jane.

< Message edited by Troilus -- 30/7/2009 5:08:20 PM >

(in reply to jamesbondguy)
Post #: 20
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 31/7/2009 3:58:35 AM   
Pigeon Army


Posts: 8638
Joined: 29/1/2006
From: Pixar HQ, George Lucas' Office.
Troilus - you're gonna fit right in here.

Also, I love how Danny Boy tries to make it sound as if all filmmakers should serve a higher purpose - "the manna they were assigned to elucidate" indeed. I'm starting to think "manna" is just another synonym for Dan Schnieder.

_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kilo_T_Mortal

Pigeon! outside! lets go you fucking youth. Me and you. Next time you come to Taiwan you're fucking arse and your arse is grass or something.


Proud President of the 'Get Carlton Banks a TV Spin-off' Association.

Film of the Week - A Serious Man (2009, Coen & Coen)

(in reply to Troilus)
Post #: 21
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 31/7/2009 4:06:22 AM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
quote:

ORIGINAL: Pigeon Army

Troilus - you're gonna fit right in here.

Also, I love how Danny Boy tries to make it sound as if all filmmakers should serve a higher purpose - "the manna they were assigned to elucidate" indeed. I'm starting to think "manna" is just another synonym for Dan Schnieder.


I love that line.  How can you elucidate manna?

edit* I know his ideas are awful, but some of these reviews are just horrifically written. Ugly, clunky, stodgy prose - especially those stupid turns of phrases. Actually no, that's not the worst thing. Those mind-numbingly banal jingles he uses as a 'witty' send off in every review are like a smug turd cherry on top of the proverbial cake. He seems to do this all the time:

F For Fake: See what a mere work of art can really do?
Blood of a Poet: Ah, such things that dreams are made of.
Spiderman 3: I put my expectations aside, let the film play out, and was rewarded. What a concept!
Werkmeister Harmonies: But, when given a rare full plate, like this, it’s okay to gorge between the famines. Grace is optional.

and my favourite

Au Hasard Balthazar: I give you Robert Bresson!

Arrgh, I hate you JBG for making me read this. I can't stop. I'm addicted. It's like watching a car crash - horrific but strangely compelling. How is this guy even a critic?


< Message edited by TheManWithNoShame -- 31/7/2009 4:17:51 AM >


_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to Pigeon Army)
Post #: 22
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 31/7/2009 4:34:06 AM   
Pigeon Army


Posts: 8638
Joined: 29/1/2006
From: Pixar HQ, George Lucas' Office.
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheManWithNoShame

Arrgh, I hate you JBG for making me read this. I can't stop. I'm addicted. It's like watching a car crash - horrific but strangely compelling. How is this guy even a critic?



He's not - he's a two-bit reviewer with delusions to criticism, and he's surrounded by yes men.


_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kilo_T_Mortal

Pigeon! outside! lets go you fucking youth. Me and you. Next time you come to Taiwan you're fucking arse and your arse is grass or something.


Proud President of the 'Get Carlton Banks a TV Spin-off' Association.

Film of the Week - A Serious Man (2009, Coen & Coen)

(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 23
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 31/7/2009 8:27:58 AM   
Troilus


Posts: 14
Joined: 19/7/2009
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheManWithNoShame

Werkmeister Harmonies: But, when given a rare full plate, like this, it’s okay to gorge between the famines.



If you squint and read that it looks like he says that it's okay to gorge between fannies. Sexist.

< Message edited by Troilus -- 31/7/2009 8:31:17 AM >

(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 24
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 6/11/2009 5:54:57 PM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
http://www.cosmoetica.com/B843-DES672.htm#Cyberstalkers

This is literally the best thing I've ever read.


_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to Troilus)
Post #: 25
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 6/11/2009 5:59:38 PM   
FritzlFan


Posts: 2146
Joined: 19/11/2008
From: Bristol
Shame on:

PigeonArmy: 6200 posts in 3.5 years TheManWithNoShame: 6100 posts in the same time frame JamesBondGuy: 5100 posts in a little over 2 years Rawlinson: 6600 posts in a little over 1 year Rhubarb: 16,750 in just under 4 years


_____________________________

Rapid Response Director of the 'Get Carlton Banks a TV Spin-off' Association.

"...shades of Terry Sheddingham."

(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 26
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 6/11/2009 6:00:38 PM   
Rhubarb


Posts: 17091
Joined: 30/9/2005
From: No Direction Home
I've genuinely had nothing better to do.

_____________________________

Über-Graecus Honoris Gratia

"Shame you won't be there to see me, shaking hands with Charles de Gaulle"

quote:

ORIGINAL: hiptobesquare_x

And don't even get me started on referring to Breathless as "a failed satire". I bet his mum looks at him and feels he's a failed example of procreation.


(in reply to FritzlFan)
Post #: 27
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 6/11/2009 6:04:50 PM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
The bit on Steven Edmondson (aka Manchurian Candidate) is absolutely amazing. Just amazing.

_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to Rhubarb)
Post #: 28
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 6/11/2009 6:11:44 PM   
FritzlFan


Posts: 2146
Joined: 19/11/2008
From: Bristol
Or "Little fudgepackin' Steven". 

< Message edited by FritzlFan -- 6/11/2009 6:16:01 PM >


_____________________________

Rapid Response Director of the 'Get Carlton Banks a TV Spin-off' Association.

"...shades of Terry Sheddingham."

(in reply to TheManWithNoShame)
Post #: 29
RE: Top 10 Worst Dan Schneider Reviews - 6/11/2009 6:21:21 PM   
TheManWithNoShame


Posts: 6350
Joined: 1/8/2006
The best part is I don't have a fucking clue who weepingsam is. He's just some name he's plucked out of thin air. 

_____________________________

"I mean, literally, could there be a more damning indictment of the utter worthlessness of these lives? They are vicarious vermin, so socially maladapted that they can only spend their time at a computer to feel joy." ~ Dan Schneider on Lists and Top 10s

"... a photo of a child with Downs Syndrome... " ~ KieronTheCommunity on a picture of Pigeon Army

(in reply to FritzlFan)
Post #: 30
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