Star Wars Characters Who DON’T Deserve Their Own Spin-Off (Full Version)

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Empire Admin -> Star Wars Characters Who DON’T Deserve Their Own Spin-Off (19/2/2013 9:38:05 AM)

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rossabroad -> (19/2/2013 9:38:05 AM)

What an incredible article you've written

Jezzman -> RE: (19/2/2013 9:47:15 AM)

Slow news day?!

Norsedwarf -> Rancor keeper (19/2/2013 10:37:40 AM)

You do realise the rancor keeper was played by the great Shakespearean actor Paul Brooke (although known to most these days from Bridget Jones Diary). Just sayin'

jojoruck -> Erm... (19/2/2013 10:41:59 AM)

Jar Jar... Yousa remember himsa?

DextersLab -> Long Time Reader, First Time Poster! (19/2/2013 10:43:34 AM)

This really is a rubbish article eh?!

DextersLab -> Long Time Reader, First Time Poster! (19/2/2013 10:51:00 AM)

This really is a rubbish article eh?!

tejo -> (19/2/2013 11:08:51 AM)

It’s more an article I’d expect from TotalFilm.

Rumpledink -> What you talking about!? (19/2/2013 12:35:22 PM)

I'd so watch Mouse Droid and Rancor Keeper!

Overmind -> (19/2/2013 2:21:06 PM)

The Malakili story would make a nice short though..

MrkyMrk -> The hate is swelling in you now... (19/2/2013 4:49:32 PM)

So many rants posted about these fun little time wasters.

Empire scribes - don't let the haters grind you down.

I do wish more folks would heed Thumper...
"If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all"

steveg66 -> (19/2/2013 7:40:08 PM)

How about the Sarlacc? At least it's digestive system could justify a trilogy unlike The Hobbit.

Heman -> JAR JAR BINKS (19/2/2013 8:25:29 PM)

How does Jar Jar not populate the entire list???

apocalypso -> (20/2/2013 1:04:49 AM)

Number 9 reminded me of this:

NeoBrowser -> (20/2/2013 4:35:29 AM)

I would add Chewbacca to this list....

rogerebert -> RE: (20/2/2013 1:18:20 PM)



Its more an article Id expect from TotalFilm.


ORIGINAL: Rumpledink

I'd so watch Mouse Droid and Rancor Keeper!

Completely agree with both of these.

jodybriggs -> Lighten up, you don't have to read it (20/2/2013 4:52:39 PM)

That's a fair amount of pissed off messages for a bit of throw away fun, it passed a few mins in work for me and gave me a smirk or two so keep up the random bits and bobs Empire.

theelusiveshaun -> (21/2/2013 12:46:20 PM)

I can see it now. Kevin James is...

Cedric Cooper: Stormtrooper

Helyx Helyx -> THEY ALL DESERVE TO BE MADE INTO SHORTS! (24/2/2013 5:08:01 AM)

I think the utter demise of said characters in short films - making one good Star Wars promo for Disney's HANDS OFF approach would restore faith in the franchise. As long as incredibly gifted writers, who could direct such comedy material in the way that Marvel Studios restored the whole idea of short films as a promo could be incredibly enjoyable to watch. I personally would like to see the utter demise of all of these characters, in Star Wars historically accurate time lines. Who would not want to see Darth Vader step on the tiny robot who is about to deliver the most important message ever to the Federation, leading Darth Vader into more heavy labored breathing anger (leading to more deaths of other side characters); mutant killer baby Ewok caused by the Federation Industrial Complex - wiping out the cannibalistic Ewoks into extinction. Get the picture? If not, then there is no Operation funny bones in the Galaxy.

Just make sure Joss Whedon gets to do one. I am sure there would be no problem finding Directors who are encumbered with their career schedules, delight in being selected to do a Star Wars promo short demises of all characters listed (and a few others I could add to the list).

These gifts of joy at their terrible tragedy would make great pre-new Star War teaser releases; why not an IMAX one as well. As long as George Lucas realizes that we are laughing with him, and not at him for these, um characters that sometimes sidelined the story finally get their comeuppance/death/several deaths at once - would add to the whole attraction of a new Star Wars. Just make sure it's great Directors who do this, or the whole project will kill off the other wondrous possibilities of these final cut-off fates of woe. It could lead to better side characters if they knew that their end could come before they even get a chance to utter one word!

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