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We live in a world where Lake Placid 4: The Final Chapter exists. The distributor sent us a cake to the office and everything! Some of us, it transpired, were not even aware that there had been a Lake Placid 2, and this turned our easily distracted minds to the world of the Direct-To-Video sequel, where franchises can continue apparently without anybody watching them. Here, then, is a representative sample - though we'd love your suggestions for an expanded follow-up feature. Never Back Down 2: The Beatdown? Timecop 2: The Berlin Decision? The Rise And Fall Of A White Collar Hooligan 2: England Away? Let us know what should be added in the comment box below...

WORDS OWEN WILLIAMS
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American Psycho

Director: Mary Harron
Starring: Christian Bale, Willem Dafoe, Jared Leto
Budget: $7m
Box Office: $34m

Plot: Adaptation of Bret Easton Ellis’ violent satirical novel. The film gives us Christian Bale in his breakout grown-up role as Patrick Bateman, a faceless Wall Street suit having a serial killing meltdown in the hideous 1980s. Something of a modern American classic, Ellis’ book was considered basically unfilmable, but Harron gave it a decent stab and managed to keep the jet-black humour and a lot of the ambiguity.

American Psycho 2

Director: Morgan J. Freeman
Starring: Mila Kunis, William Shatner

Plot: A slasher film with a new female psycho, and the tagline “Angrier, deadlier, sexier”. It’s possible that somebody didn’t quite understand the point of the original. Mila Kunis is the killer (not a spoiler, that) and William Shatner plays a former fed who’s now a college professor. It was 2002: he hadn’t got Boston Legal yet. This was originally a standalone screenplay called The Girl Who Wouldn’t Die. The hastily written-in connection to American Psycho is that Kunis’ babysitter dated Patrick Bateman. Only once, though…

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Your Comments

21 RE: Why the clicking?
You've obviously never been tortured... not that I have but I can imagine it would be more painful than clicking a button. More

Posted by BigPhillimon on Tuesday June 11, 2013, 17:39

22 Wow
Literally hadn't heard most of these. You think Hollywood might stop churning these out as they obviously made no money.... American Psycho 2, back to school WTF??? More

Posted by BigPhillimon on Tuesday June 11, 2013, 17:37

23 Why the clicking?
Why do you think people will click through 40 pages loading? It would be much less annoying to have it as a scrolled list down a few pages. Gave up clicking at 11. Torturous. More

Posted by JonnyStout on Tuesday June 11, 2013, 17:30

24 Took Fairy & TF:2
Rock as a Tooth Fairy - Fish out of water movie. Larry The Cable Guy as a Tooth Fairy - Eye Dee Ten Tee over his head. More

Posted by AjaDonaldRussell on Tuesday June 11, 2013, 17:04

25 Gregory's Two Girls
nuff said More

Posted by themaddogmax on Tuesday June 11, 2013, 17:04

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