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Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford)
Before you spill bile on the comments or hit The Twitters to tell us that he’s a dad and this breaks the rules, we’re a) focusing on Indy in Temple Of Doom, years before Mutt is so much as a twinkle in Marion’s eye, and b) looking to forget that Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull ever existed, okay? Back in his Temple days, Indy’s main paternal interaction was with sidekick Short Round (Ke Huy Quan), who helped him out on his archaeological adventures. While he likes to come off as gruff and solitary, Indy definitely had a soft spot for the kid. And how many youngsters can claim the sort of adventure Shorty gets into? Even if child protection services would probably have something to say about him being enslaved in a mine while his alleged guardian is turned briefly into a mindless zombie by a cult. Father’s Day Gift Recommendation: Hypnotism to cure his fear of snakes.
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