5. GHOSTS OF GIRLFRIENDS PAST (2009)
Imagine A Christmas Carol that features neither Christmas nor carols, and preaches the virtues of monogamy rather than charity, and you pretty much have this film. A womaniser (McConaughey) who’s a lot less charming than his usual characters screws up his brother’s rehearsal dinner and has a visit from the ghost of the uncle who taught him his slutty ways. That’s followed by the shades of three women who teach him the error of his ways, so that he finally gets together with childhood sweetheart Jenny (Jennifer Garner) and patches up his brother’s wedding.
It all poses an interesting philosophical conundrum: how can these girlfriends be ghosts if they are alive? One of them at least is present at the wedding and not obviously comatose or eligible for any sort of out-of-body experience, what with being visibly in her body. So is this some sort of spectral body-snatching affair? Are actual spirits squatting in the personalities of these women in order to assist some bloke who treated said women badly? Way to make women subservient to your asshat central character!
Alternatively, is McConaughey imagining the whole thing in some sort of schizoid break? Then why does he imagine his eldery, dead uncle hitting on the phantasm of his 16 year-old ex-girlfriend? That is one sick puppy. And does someone who has borderline lost it really deserve to end up with lovely Jennifer Garner? We’re not sure they have thought this through.
In short: dead on arrival.