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Feature
The 20 Greatest X-Files Episodes
We count down Mulder and Scully’s coolest cases

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4. Die Hand Die Verletzt

Die Hand Die Verletzt

Episode: Season 2, Episode 14
Aired: January 27, 1995

Mulder and Scully frequently fail to collar the perps they’re hunting, which is perhaps unsurprising given how difficult it is to put handcuffs on inter-dimensional sludge-monsters. This episode sees their adversary — a snake-eyed demon (or maybe even Satan himself?) imitating a high-school substitute teacher (Susan Blommaert) — slip through their fingers come the third act, but it only adds to the vibe of total dread that permeates Die Hand Die Verletzt. The Feds arrive in the town of Milford Haven, New Hampshire, to find a community racked by fear after the discovery in the forest of a teenager who’s had his eyes and heart ripped out. It turns out that the teachers at Milford Haven High have been dabbling in black magic, but the real Big Bad is something much more nefarious, a being so powerful that she / it can sic a giant boa constrictor on an enemy, force a young girl to slit her wrists, or compel toads to fall from the sky. It’s altogether a thoroughly dark and creepy episode, leavened slightly by the odd playful moment (like the taunting note left on the blackboard for Mulder and Scully after Mrs. Paddock has slipped away) and the presence of Dan Butler, aka Bulldog from Frasier.

X-Fact: Butler was so terrified while doing his scene with the snake that no fake sweat was required.

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Have Your Say
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Your Comments

1 Jose Chung, foos!
I hate to be one of those people commenting on what's missing ... but ... Jose Chung's From Outer Space is the greatest ep in the history of man. It's so intricate, you have to watch it more than once to get all the subtleties. But on face value, it's hysterical. Amazing performance from Charles Nelson Reilly. Worth it for Mulder's yep alone. But this is Darin Morgan's tour de force. It turns everything on its ear and an ep from which the seeds of great other eps like Bad Blood were sown. More

Posted by xpai on Thursday November 7, 2013, 18:50

2 X-CEPT
The funniest episode was, by far, Hollywood AD. The moment when Gary Shandling's Mulder says "Oh, I love you Scully!" to Duchovny's wife, is hysterical and super-meta! Also includes the first-ever TV use of the word "Bazinga"! More

Posted by Grimm on Friday October 25, 2013, 13:10

3
I fully expected to read this list and instantly want to come in and start ranting and raving about what was left out but its so bang on the money that I really don't have much to complain about. I would bemoan the lack of Humbug and Jose Chungs from Outer Space. The latter in particular. You may have already had a decent amount of Darin Morgan entries but these two were pure gold. More

Posted by Evil_Bob on Wednesday October 23, 2013, 13:22

4 X files fanatic!
Most of my faves are in there, with the exception of Oubliette, Syzygy and Quagmire - 3 I watch over and over. Thanks for the celebration feature Empire - love it! More

Posted by annie__hall on Wednesday October 23, 2013, 12:28

5 my list
In dire need of an update especially because my list only covers season 1-5 Season 1 Pilot Deep Throat Squeeze Ice Fallen Angel E.B.E. Darkness Falls Tooms The Erlenmeyer Flask Season 2 Little Green Men The Host Duane Barry Ascension Firewalker Død Kalm Humbug Anasazi Season 3 The Blessing Way Paper Clip D.P.O. Nisei 731 War of the Coprophages Piper Maru Apocrypha Jose Chung's From Outer Space Wetwired Talitha Cumi Season 4 Herrenvolk Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man Tunguska Terma Paper Hearts Tempus Fugit Max Season 5 Redux Redux II Unusual Suspects The Post-Modern Prometheus Kill Switch Bad Blood The Pine Bluff Variant Folie a Deux The End More

Posted by MattBecker on Monday October 21, 2013, 23:37

6 Some favorites missing
It's an ok list for including Bad Blood, Small Potatoes, Clyde Bruckman, Piper Maru, and Duane Barry but where is Paper Hearts, Redux II, Monday, Field Trip and Tunguska? More

Posted by mulscul on Monday October 21, 2013, 16:25

7 This list is an X File
Honestly, the most bizarre XF list I've ever seen. The whole list is null and void through its omission of 'Pusher' which is a firm fan favourite and showcases everything wonderful about the show; the talent and chemistry of the main actors, the story writing, the guest stars, the cinematography... Having said that, it is fantastic to see this show being honoured and hopefully glossing over the damage caused by IWTB. More

Posted by johugrix on Saturday October 19, 2013, 21:58

8
Good list all around. Would have liked to have seen "Humbug" somewhere though. That's easily my favorite episode. More

Posted by GomJabber11 on Saturday October 19, 2013, 16:11

9 Almost hits the mark.
The titles on this list pretty much equal my own. However, I could leave Die Hand Die Verletz and put either Arcadia, The Field Where I died, 4D, or Quagmire, all excellent episodes. I recently finished rewatching all 9 seasons and have found it far more enjoyable now than 20 years ago. Still my all time favourite tv show. I hope we can get movie No. 3 rolling, although the script would need to be far better than the 2008 film 'I Want To Believe'. More

Posted by angelzbabe on Saturday October 19, 2013, 01:08

10 Yes, Bad Blood!
I have watched that episode more than any episode of anything ever! Countless funny moments. Mulder singing Shaft. Luke Wilson's teeth. Mulder kicked the trash can. Absolute classic. The Lake Placid-esque episode was also a terrific stand alone one. But by and large, I can't argue with this list. More

Posted by tysmuse on Friday October 18, 2013, 21:07

11 Nostalgia
I've got all of the box sets and this feature has made up my mind to go back and rewatch them all! More

Posted by Hugh_Fran on Friday October 18, 2013, 19:42

12 Death by autoerotic asphyxiation
Just as Clyde Bruckman foresaw, this is indeed how Mulder died (or at least David Duchovny in Steven Soderbergh's 'Full Frontal'). More

Posted by davidtharwood.com on Friday October 18, 2013, 15:25

13 X-Cops
That episode was the one that introduced me to The X Files... great episode! More

Posted by TPM007 on Friday October 18, 2013, 14:39

14 You've missed the best!
One of the best episodes ever was Anasazi. The Field Where I Died was also amazing! More

Posted by paterk2 on Friday October 18, 2013, 14:22

15 You missed out by far the best episode!
Jose Chung's From Outer Space! Every X-Files fan I've spoken to say this is their favourite episode! More

Posted by Psycho Savager on Friday October 18, 2013, 14:13

16 Dreamland?
Some good choices there. A few of my favourites included by definitely think you missed a trick by not including the "Dreamland" 2 parter from season 6 - Michael McKean is excellent and hilarious in it and "Monday" from the same season. More

Posted by Scruffybobby on Friday October 18, 2013, 14:13

17
It's "Die Wahrheit ist Irgendwo da draußen", not "drauben" :) More

Posted by Cherubin28 on Friday October 18, 2013, 13:55

18 One Breath (number 15)
This was my favourite. I still remember one of the best quotes from the series, from when Scully finally wakes up from her coma: Mulder: "Bought you a present. Superstars of the Superbowl". Scully: "I knew there was a reason to live." More

Posted by Arfpint on Friday October 18, 2013, 13:49

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