Register  |   Log In  |  
Sign up to our weekly newsletter    
Search   
Empire Magazine and iPad
Follow Me on Pinterest YouTube Tumblr
Empire
Trending On Empire
Done In 60 Seconds Competition 2015
Guide To Marvel's Infinity War
The Making Of The West Wing
Get 12 Issues For Only £25 Today
The perfect gift this Christmas
Farewell To Middle-earth
Full details of our Peter Jackson-edited issue
Feature
The Best / Worst Movie Poster Tagline Jokes
Brilliant, terrible or brilliantly terrible? You decide...

submit to reddit

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...
Back 3 of 12 Next
The Best / Worst Movie Poster Tagline Jokes | Crank 2 (2009)
Crank 2 (2009)

"He was dead... but he got better."


At the end of Crank, Chev Chelios dies after falling out of a helicopter and landing flat in the middle of a busy city street. But by Crank 2, everything’s fine and dandy for our man Chev – aside from the fact that he needs regular top-ups of electricity to power his new artificial heart or, you know, he’ll die. In this way, he does indeed die, and does indeed get better, though medical purists – also known as humanity – may not be able to pull off the same trick in real life.

Better than the film? As it contains one of the best insults in the history of cinema – “You pair of sausage nigels!”  – they’re around about the same level.

Marks Out Of A Pundred: It’s not actually a pun, so how about… 120/240. And if you get that ‘joke’, you’re either an electrician or a physics teacher, so well done you.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...
Back
3 of 12
Next

Have Your Say
Register or login now to let us know what you think.

Your Comments

1 Fast and Furious
'new model, same parts'. More

Posted by spark1 on Tuesday November 13, 2012, 10:16

2 RE: The Best / Worst Movie Poster Tagline Jokes
The first thing I thought about when I saw the Crank 2 tagline was John Cleese in The Holy Grail saying 'I got better' after claiming he got turned in to a newt. More

Posted by wazzock on Sunday November 11, 2012, 14:19

3 From Paris
I LOVED the one for From Paris With Love cause even it's saying no thank you to it's premise. More

Posted by AgentDesmond on Sunday November 11, 2012, 03:48

4 Other great taglines
I have a few crackers that were missed out from the list: "In space, no one can eat ice cream!" - Killer Klowns From Outer Space "Their crime was against nature... nature found them guilty" - Lost Weekend "This might hurt a little" - Sicko "Get a grip on yourself" - Spanking the Monkey "You can tell yourself IT'S ONLY A MOVIE... but it won't help!" - Night Train Murders (an Italian Last House on the Left rip-off) "It will take your breath away... all of it" - Dead and Buried "By pick, by axe, by sword, bye-bye" - The Mutilator "Herbert West has a good head above his shoulders... and another one in a dish on his desk" - Re-Animator "If you have guts... he wants them!" - Nightbeast "Where shopping can cost you an arm and a leg" - Chopping Mall More

Posted by SteveWev on Saturday November 10, 2012, 23:03

5 RE: Naked Gun 2 1/2:
Dr Giggles from the early 90's wins the schlock award - "If you're from Moorehigh and you get sick, fall on your knees, and pray you die quick!" More

Posted by Fit Kisto on Saturday November 10, 2012, 20:55

6 Naked Gun 2 1/2:
From the brother of the director of Ghost. Genius. More

Posted by rosskmiller on Saturday November 10, 2012, 10:41

7 Best Tagline Ever...
Is from 'The Dentist 2', Brian Yuzna's 1998 schlocker. I've never been tempted to watch the film as it would ruin the tagline. "You Know The Drill." Genius! More

Posted by Lazarus munkey on Saturday November 10, 2012, 04:19

8 You missed "He sits. He stays. He shoots. He scores!!"
...the tagline from "Airbud" about a basketball-playing dog that made me laugh out loud. Not enough to watch the frikkin movie of course. l'm not 3..... More

Posted by dunstabledoug on Wednesday November 7, 2012, 16:28

9 RE: The Best / Worst Movie Poster Tagline Jokes
Two of the so-called terrible ones aren't taken in the right context. From paris With Love - Two agents, one city, no merci. No merci could also be read as "No thank you" which is what I wish I'd said before watching this piece of shit. AVP - Whoever wins, we lose. This works on two levels If the movie had turned out to be good then it would have been a BAD ASS tag-line. As it stands it was an awful film so it's pretty apt. More

Posted by Evil_Bob on Wednesday November 7, 2012, 10:10

10 Or how about
The brilliantly succinct tagline to the South Park movie? "Uh-oh" More

Posted by Lucy McCaul on Tuesday November 6, 2012, 21:50

11 VG
best tagline ever: "one man, one night, one gun" from the movie "Top Down City", a noir mockery poster from a videogame (which one?). More

Posted by Grimm on Tuesday November 6, 2012, 12:07

12
'You have the right to remain silent... forever.' - Maniac Cop 1 & 2. Brilliant. More

Posted by iain81 on Tuesday November 6, 2012, 10:44

13 Win/Lose
'back for war' was great tag for 'expendables' shame prequel to 'alien' produced a lame one. More

Posted by spark1 on Tuesday November 6, 2012, 10:21

14 Drano is...
It may not be popular (or even available) in the U.K. but Drano is a popular U.S.-based toilet bowl cleaner. More

Posted by EriCritic on Tuesday November 6, 2012, 00:47

15 Always loved Commando's, although it's not a pun.
LET'S PARTY. More

Posted by loafroaster on Monday November 5, 2012, 21:52

16 You'll laugh! You'll cry! You'll hurl!
Wayne's World. More

Posted by loafroaster on Monday November 5, 2012, 21:50

17
phil.margetson, that Predator 2 one is brilliant! I always liked Black Sheep - The Violence Of The Lambs. More

Posted by benthemitchell on Monday November 5, 2012, 18:37

18 Predator 2
"He's in town with a few days to kill." Superb. More

Posted by phil.margetson on Monday November 5, 2012, 18:15

SUBSCRIPTION OFFERS

SAVE UP TO 48% GET 12 ISSUES FOR ONLY £25
Get the best seat in the house by subscribing to the world's biggest movie magazine today. Save up to 69% and every month you'll get exclusive subscriber-only covers, access to the biggest stars and the best news, reviews and behind-the-scenes reports straight from the set. Click here to find the perfect offer for you


CURRENT HIGHLIGHTS
Empire's Jurassic World Trailer Tour
We guide you, Richard Kiley-style, through the secrets of the new park

Empire's Hobbit: Battle Of The Five Armies Covers
Five armies. Five covers. The eagles, dwarves, elves, men and orcs prepare for battle in our Peter Jackon guest-edited issue

Empire’s Peter Jackson Issue Subscribers' Cover Arrives
Five Armies, three elves, two heavenly creatures and one giant ape

Empire's Farewell To Middle-Earth Issue:
Guest -Edited By Peter Jackson

The countdown to Empire's stunning new issue begins here...

Josh Hutcherson On The Hunger Games Phenomenon
'I've done my fair share of young adult material now'

What Is A Squidward? A Beginner's Guide To SpongeBob SquarePants
If you aren’t already a massive fan, prepare to become one

Classic Feature: Gods Among Us - Robert De Niro
The heavyweight champion of character immersion, explosive rage and jawdropping subtleties

Subscribe to Empire magazine
Get 12 Issues Of Empire For Only £25!

Get exclusive subscriber-only covers each month!

Subscribe today

Subscribe to Empire iPad edition
Get The Empire iPad Edition Today

Subscribe and save money on annual digital subscription

Subscribe today
Buy single issues

Get 12 issues of Empire for just £25!
Get the world's greatest movie magazine delivered straight to your door! Subscribe today!
Empire's Film Studies 101 Series
Everything you ever wanted to know about filmmaking but were afraid to ask...
The Empire iPad Edition
With exclusive extras, interactive features, trailers and much more! Download now
Home  |  News  |  Blogs  |  Reviews  |  Future Films  |  Features  |  Interviews  |  Images  |  Competitions  |  Forum  |  iPad  |  Podcast  |  Magazine Contact Us  |  Empire FAQ  |  Subscribe To Empire  |  Register
© Bauer Consumer Media Ltd  |  Legal Info  |  Editorial Complaints  |  Privacy Policy  |  Bauer Entertainment Network
Bauer Consumer Media Ltd (company number 01176085 and registered address 1 Lincoln Court, Lincoln Road, Peterborough, England PE1 2RF)