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There are classic ‘80s end credits songs, and then there are most of them. Some people like to sit in the theatre until the final studio logo, but the following – with the honourable exception of the Ramones – seem almost as if they were designed to clear a cinema as fast as possible (which seems particularly unkind to the staff who had to endure them as they cleared up the spilled popcorn). Songs of peace and love for violent action movies; dayglo anthems for forgotten musical farragos; attempted hit singles by cast members who should know better; terrible rhymes; and many strange things happening to people’s hearts: all are in store for those of you who can get beyond page one. Warning: severe danger of unwanted earworms.