Register  |   Log In  |  
Sign up to our weekly newsletter    
Empire Magazine and iPad
Follow Me on Pinterest YouTube Tumblr Viber
Trending On Empire
The Big 2015 Movie Preview
The 50 Best Films Of 2014
Review Of The Year 2014
Subscribe to Empire!
Save up to 63%
Want To Be An Empire Journalist?
We're looking for reporters for the BFI London Film Festival
Absurdly Cool Movie Weapons
When you absolutely, positively, need to lay the smackdown...

submit to reddit

Here at Empire we don’t condone violence in any form. Unless your first name happens to be Chev and your last name Chelios, it rarely solves anything. Sometimes, just sometimes, though, cinematic scenarios demand a touch of the rough stuff. It's at times like that, ladies and gentlemen, that this weird and wonderful weaponfest comes in handy, gathering together the most ludicrous weapons ever wielded on screen -- and before you object, if it's just a big gun, it ain't in here. And as for the lightsaber? Well, that goes without saying...

WORDS Alastair Plumb
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...
  1 of 15 Next
Absurdly Cool Movie Weapons | The Holy Shotgun
The Holy Shotgun

First seen in: Constantine (2005)

Why it’s so ludicrous: It’s a crucifix and a shotgun. Made of gold. Covered with religious engravings and constructed from relics, it boasts a 12 shot spinning drum cylinder and an ever-so-sacrilegious mini-crucifix crosshair. Alongside the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, it’s the most blasphemous weapon to hit cinema. In anyone else’s hands, a 12-bore crucifix would look ridiculous, but in Keanu Reeves’ determined mitts, it lo… no, wait, it still looks ridiculous.

Most useful when: You want to get expelled from Catholic school. In style.


1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...
1 of 15

Have Your Say
Register or login now to let us know what you think.

Your Comments

1 RE: Absurdly Cool Movie Weapons
I thought the Flaming Sword was a bit unnecessary. In a year if the list was compiled again I doubt it would even be considered. But I thought the Noisy Cricket was genius. More

Posted by Non Forumite on Monday August 30, 2010, 01:51

2 RE: The suction-bomb cannon from Hudson Hawk
Well they had to fit in ANOTHER plug for Scott Pilgrim, because I've never seen a flaming sword beforegn=left] More

Posted by vader100 on Thursday August 26, 2010, 02:16

3 RE: Star Trek
Triple Barrled Shotgun from Undead or Lawnmower from Braindead?! More

Posted by Invader_Ace on Tuesday August 24, 2010, 20:33

4 RE: crotch cannon
Ummmm Light Sabers aside (Shame on you Empire) where is Rose McGowan's modified M4 Carbine with M203 grenade launcher attachment from Planet Torror Ok i know this is a real weapon BUT IT IS ATTACHED TO HER FUCKIN LEG how cool is that, i mean she could go to scratch her calf and level a school by mistake   Or the Proton Pack from Ghostbusters   Surely the the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch was onE of the first truely absurd weapons in film and deserves a place rather than a mention alongside The Holy Shotgun   More

Posted by doenutts on Monday August 23, 2010, 21:58

5 RE: Eh?
No Golden Gun! No Lightsaber Otherwise I am happy More

Posted by Charlie Green on Monday August 23, 2010, 19:42

Jessica Chastain On The Martian
On becoming an astronaut and rescuing Matt Damon AGAIN

My Movie Life: Justin Kurzel
The Macbeth director on how Rocky changed his life and the worst ever date movie

Life On Mars: Trips To The Red Planet
A dozen of cinema's Martian misadventures

Hallowed Ground: Folk Horror In British Film
Ten tales from our island's dark past

All Hail Macbeth! The Scottish Play On Film
By the pricking of our thumbs, ten adaptations this way come(s)

Licence Denied: The Bond Themes You Didn't Get To Hear
A dozen of 007's greatest misses

10 Star Wars: The Force Awakens Toys You’ll Want To Own
Falcon quad copter? BB-8 Sphero? We’re already asking for pay raises…

Subscribe to Empire magazine
Empire print magazine

Delivered to your door – with exclusive subscriber only covers each month! Save money today and

Subscribe now!

Subscribe to Empire iPad edition
Empire digital magazine

Exclusive and enhanced content – get instant access via your iPad or Android device! Save money today and

Subscribe now!

Subscribe now and save up to 63%
Print, Digital & Package options available Subscribe today!
Empire's Film Studies 101 Series
Everything you ever wanted to know about filmmaking but were afraid to ask...
The Empire Digital Edition
With exclusive extras, interactive features, trailers and much more! Download now
Home  |  News  |  Blogs  |  Reviews  |  Future Films  |  Features  |  Interviews  |  Images  |  Competitions  |  Forum  |  Digital Edition  |  Podcast  |  Magazine Contact Us  |  Empire FAQ  |  Subscribe To Empire  |  Register
© Bauer Consumer Media Ltd  |  Legal Info  |  Editorial Complaints  |  Privacy Policy  |  Bauer Entertainment Network
Bauer Consumer Media Ltd (company number 01176085 and registered address 1 Lincoln Court, Lincoln Road, Peterborough, England PE1 2RF)