My Perfect Movie Family | The Empire Blog

My Perfect Movie Family

Posted on Thursday January 15, 2009, 14:57 by Emily Phillips in Empire States

It seems like a distant and very dim memory now, but Christmas with all the family got me thinking about a game I used to play with my brother when we were younger, where in place of all of those family members you spend the rest of year trying to forget, you cast a brand spanking, shiny new family. We used to use TV personalities- substituting Terry Wogan or Rolf Harris as the grandfather and so on.

Now I am not saying that I myself do not love and cherish all of my family members, but play along if you will…

I myself like to think of Angela Lansbury in any incarnation as my TV or movie grandmother (and especially as Miss Price in Bedknobs and Broomsticks). The soft fuzzy peachiness of her lovable face and the warm tone of her voice. You could just imagine her baking a lovely Victoria sponge for you on a Sunday afternoon, before she goes off to write her murder mysteries at her well-used typewriter.

Now who would make the ideal granddad? There are few male actors who go on to old age without being terribly effete and luvvie-ish or disgruntled old grumpusses. But for some reason, Donald Sutherland goes against the grain on this- he has had a long and distinguished career, and yet retains the cheerful wit and lightness associated with a much younger man. His Mr Bennet in the new Pride & Prejudice would certainly be my number one choice, not for a father, but certainly for a granddad.

Then on to the parents- those two people responsible for bringing you into the world and making you who you are now. I personally base this choice a little along the lines of who reminds me of my actual parents- and for my dad I err between James Gandolfini (especially as Tony Soprano) and Bruce Willis. However, as my own baldy father is now a man of the law, I will have to go for the hard man with a soft centre, who is only ever fighting to protect his family and do right at whatever cost- Officer John McClane. He’s strong and protective and just the kind of dad you know you could rely on.

The more difficult part to pick for is that of the mother. My own mum is a complicated woman, diminutive and pretty, funny and yet strong and determined. So who could fill those boots? Well, apart from the fact that there are few actresses “of a certain age” who have more warmth than could fill a thimble, there is also the idea that the mother “character” would have to fit with the father figure. So I went through some names (some of whom were just actresses my own dad fancies- like Daryl Hannah and Helen Mirren) and then I came upon Goldie Hawn (perhaps in The First Wives Club). OK so she is a bit older than my mum, but she has the same kind of eternal cuteness, and the youthful exuberance that my mum has in spades. Besides, who would not love a mum who has starred in classics like Private Benjamin, Death Becomes Her and Overboard?

And then it is the turn of the siblings. Now I have only one brother, who is nothing like any actor or character I have seen (well perhaps Jude Law as Robby Ross in Oscar, although he would prefer to be seen as James Dean I am sure), so I am going to go ahead and pick someone as far from him as possible as my movie brother. Who would be both the coolest and geekiest little bro ever? Christopher Mintz-Plass as McLovin! He would have you in stitches, never need help with his homework and would always be up for some sort of jape. For the sister I never had, I would pick the one and only Anne Hathaway (in any role, but most probably as Andy from The Devil Wears Prada). She would have to be my twin (we are born on the same day) – and although I would forever be filled with envy, but always safe in the knowledge that even though she’s clever, pretty and witty, I get the impression she would also be down to earth, and no doubt an awesome sis.

Then there are the extraneous members of the clan, the aunties and uncles you don’t see that much. Michelle Pfeiffer, as Lamia in Stardust, would be the perfect ice-queen aunt, and I reckon Natalie Portman as Mathilda in Leon would be a cool cousin to get into scrapes with as a kid. The best uncle ever, would have to be Bill Murray, in practically any film, but especially as Peter Venkman in Ghost Busters. Then maybe throw in a glamorous relative from the continent- perhaps Monica Belluci in Malena or Audrey Tatou in Priceless. They could teach you everything there is to know about European style and be sure not to knit you anything unglamorous like a real relative would.

So, who would be your movie family? Give me your cinematic genealogies below…