Avengers Twitter Jokes Round-Up

Avengers Twitter Jokes Round-Up

Posted on Wednesday April 18, 2012, 17:52 by Ali Plumb in Empire States

Earlier this week, we gave our Twitter followers a challenge: make up an Avengers joke. The prize? A pair of tickets for the Avengers Assemble European premiere in Westfield, London.

Perhaps unsurprisingly we were swamped with hundreds of responses, which varied from the truly dreadful to the, um, not so truly dreadful.

So it was our honour and our duty to dig through them all, eventually picking two winners, who can be found below - and below that, you can see the other greatest hits you guys came up with... if you dare.

Proper Optimus ‏ @beggarsoshat
Can't wait to try Thor and Tony Stark's new brand of toothpaste, Armor & Hammer #Avengersjoke

Genevieve Taylor ‏ @GenGens
What do you get when you cross Captain America with The Hulk? The Star-Spangled Banner! #Avengersjoke

Laura Beth Hirst ‏ @laurabhirst
Found Iron Man,Hulk,Thor,Cap'n America,Black Widow & Hawkeye in the bins, they said they were the Sc'avengers* #Avengersjoke

The Real Sumit Dutta ‏ @SumitKD
What did the ice salesman say to Thor? Bifrost! #Avengersjoke (sorry its quite early)

Luciano Disandolo ‏ @Luciano_D1
Why does @twhiddleston never appear in Avenger tribute acts? Because he has no Loki-like... #avengersjoke

Sophia Shillito ‏ @sophiashillito
Not sure how people could get Avengers Assemble confused w the 60s show. One of them's much more apeeling. #Avengersjoke

Turtle ‏ @turtleinlondon
When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris. #AvengersJoke

Nadia ‏ @reveriewit
Why did hipster Loki not want to go back to Jotunheim? Because he visited before it was cool #Avengersjoke

What would Iron Man be without a sense of humour? Batman #Avengersjoke #HeReallyNeedsToLightenUp

Why does Tony Stark call his ex-girlfriend by the wrong name? Because he wants to repulsor #BaRumPumTish #Avengersjoke

James Passey ‏ @Pastillio
What did Ron Burgundy say to motivate the Avengers? NEWS TEAM ASSEMBLE! #Avengersjoke

Aaron E ‏ @areveritt
The Hulk and Jolly Green Giant walked into a bar... It was the setup to a corny joke. #Avengersjoke

Knock knock Who's there? Hawkeye Hawkeye who? *Sigh* #Avengersjoke

Dallas King ‏ @ChampCelluloid
Most likely to get laid, Captain America or the creator of Mickey Mouse? Cap cause Steve Rogers & Walt Disney #Avengersjoke

When not busy saving the world Iron Man, Thor, Cap & Hulk play in a percussion group called Avengers A Cymbal #Avengersjoke

Anna Kirk-McCoy ‏ @BonesCrazy24
Where do Avengers go on holiday? Whedon south. #Avengersjoke

What is a pig Avenger called? Porkeye. #Avengersjoke

What do you call a group of angry British policeman? Nick fury. #Avengersjoke

What's bright and screams happy birthday? Bruce Banner. #Avengersjoke

David Kelly ‏ @David_DK_Kelly
Thor was an inconsistent salesman. He couldnt sell snow to eskimos but did convince the icegiants to bifrost. #Avengersjoke

Why did Iron Man have to pick up Sloane Peterson from school? Because it was Ferrous Bueller's Day Off. #Avengersjoke

Craig Palmer ‏ @palmer_zan
On a scale of 1-10, my favourite superhero is Thor. #Avengersjoke

Danielle Adams ‏ @daniadamsart
What song does thor hate the most? The loki-motion! It's the way I tell em! #Avengersjoke

Daniel Gaze ‏ @piccolo135
What do you call an Ant-Man with no legs? A Raisin. #Avengersjoke #imsorry

Shaun Beaton ‏ @ 92Beaton
Q. What is the hulks favourite part of a joke? A. The punch line #Avengersjoke

Priya ‏ @PriyaT01
What did the Avengers call themselves when they joined a jazz club? The Low-keys. #Avengersjoke

James Thompson ‏ @thommoj03
What's Tony Stark's favourite fruit? A Mandarin #avengersjoke

David Yates ‏ @Dyatesy88
What football team does thor support? West Hammer United... #avengersjoke

Matt Looker ‏ @marziepanic
My mate composed the score for Kenneth Branagh's last film. He must have made a Thor tune. #Avengersjoke #WhathaveIbecome

Halit Bozdogan ‏ @TheBozDog
Nick Fury walks into a bar. Which hurt,but dn't worry, it's only because his depth perception is a little off. #avengersjoke

Who is Thor's favourite musician? MC Hammer. Yup, I actually went there. #avengersjoke

Jamie Allan ‏ @JameJame_Allan
Iron Man has made a line of casual wear. But it's not his strong suit. #Avengersjoke

Tom Wilson ‏ @therealTWilson
Dude, What is Joss Whedon's favourite element? Probably Iron, man #BaDumTish #Avengersjoke

Yinster ‏ @Yinster
Hulk does not know how many members are on his team: Poor guy can only count to Thor. #Avengersjoke

Sarah Deen ‏ @saz2kool
What's the only thing that can open a small door? A Loki #Avengersjoke

Who is the cuddliest member of the team? Nick Furry. #Avengersjoke

Proper Optimus ‏ @beggarsoshat
Captain America also gets stuck cooking dinner. He's the Star-spangled man with the flan #Avengersjoke

Captain America always gets stuck running the Avengers creche. He's the Star-spangled man with the pram. #Avengersjoke

Benjamin Rolt ‏ @BenjaminRolt
"Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry, I back up my rage with facts and documented sources." The credible Hulk

Hannah Kate ‏ @theodorealtman
I'm having a party and inviting all the superheroes. Just don't tell the Asgardians, I'm trying to keep it Loki #avengersjoke

Tobi Wilson ‏ @tobiwilson56
Q: Which member of the Avengers has been in the most films? A: Hulk, he's always in shorts. #avengersjoke

NatashaHodgson ‏ @NatashaHodgson
Why didn't Tom Hiddleston invite the rest of the Avengers cast to his party? He wanted to keep things Loki #avengersjoke

Urvisha ‏ @vishsofly
http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ltuo0aE5LO1qfils9o1_500.png

Paul Chambers ‏ @pauljchambers
Did you hear about the emotion thief who worked for S.H.I.E.L.D.? He tried to Nick Fury #Avengersjoke

Genevieve Taylor ‏ @GenGens
Which 'superhero' is a cross between Steve Rogers and Thor? Captain Hammer! #Avengersjoke #DrHorriblejoke #Whedonjoke