Empire States: Ireland For Sale
Posted on Monday November 22, 2010, 17:26 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 So, in case you haven’t been following the news lately, Ireland’s in a spot of financial bother. The sort of bother that means they’ve had to go straight past those lovely people from Wonga.com, and go cap in hand to the EU for some bailout money. Lots of bailout money. All the bailout money in the world, as far as we can tell.
But did it really have to come to this? Ireland is a beautiful country, steeped in cultural and cinematic treasures, and could make a bob or two by flogging those to the highest bidder. How much, for example, are the following little beauties worth?
Colin Farrell’s little black book
Although Ireland’s most legendary pork swordsman has never really made a habit of notching up A-listers (at least, that we know of), his list of conquests includes some of the world’s most beautiful women and would make Warren Beatty green with envy. His little black book would be like your very own, ultra-exclusive, dating sit... Continue reading... Comment Now (29 comments)
Back To TopSmall Screen: The World Cup: An Alternative Viewing Guide
Posted on Friday June 11, 2010, 13:25 by Chris Hewitt in Small Screen
 The World Cup – that most glorious of football fests – starts today, in South Africa. And, while I’ve made detailed and unnecessarily complicated plans to watch pretty much every one of the 64 games coming our way over the coming month, word reaches me that Fifa’s brainchild isn’t to everyone’s liking. James Dyer, for example, refuses to acknowledge its existence and is the only curmudgeon in the office who wouldn’t take part in our World Cup sweepstake (I got Spain, by the way).
So, to cater for those film fans who think that the only good football match is the one that takes place in Escape To Victory, I’m going to put together a blog giving you viewing alternatives to the madness that’s taking place in South Africa.
The blog will be updated on a regular basis, so keep checking back.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
7.30pm, Spain v Germany... Continue reading... Comment Now (23 comments)
Back To TopEmpire States: Paddy Power Can't Give You Guillermo del Toro Back...
Posted on Tuesday June 1, 2010, 15:20 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 Paddy Power, those well-known film buffs (they’ve got every DVD in the Criterion Collection, except for Armageddon, which they taped off Sky), have just sent us the most staggering press release of the summer so far: a rundown of odds on the contenders to direct The Hobbit.
Paddy Power’s contenders, that is. For their list mainly seems to be a smattering of famous directors, rather than actual contenders to replace Guillermo del Toro at the helm of the Lord of the Rings prequel(s). There’s no Sam Raimi on there, for instance. No Neill Blomkamp (even though we think that he’s a true longshot). No Frank Darabont (who would be on any shortlist we drew up). Instead, we get… well, let’s take a look, shall we?
Sir Peter Jackson 5/4 – the overwhelming favourite. Nothing wrong with PJ’s name here – he did direct LOTR, after all, and is executive producer and co-writer of Continue reading... Comment Now (8 comments)
Back To TopEmpire States: Ash Cloud Vs Hollywood
Posted on Monday April 19, 2010, 16:45 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 It’s the number one story on everyone’s lips. Frankly, it’s the only thing people have been talking about in the Empire office today. How could Adrian Chiles jump ship from the BBC to join ITV? Will MOTD 2 ever be the same? What will Steve Rider do now that he won’t be hosting Formula 1 or football on ITV? Are they really going to get that dancing loon off BBC Breakfast to replace Chilesey on The One Show sofa?
Oh, and then there’s that bloody great big cloud of ash, jamming up the works and impacting on everyone’s lives. We thought, frankly, that it would be gone by now, but top boffins have punched in some numbers and now fear that the colossal column of pyroclastic nonsense could be with us for some time. There’s already talk that it could have a massive impact on an economy that’s just now starting to bloom again, with airlines losing millions with every passing day, and importers/exporters being unable to do what they do. But ther... Continue reading... Comment Now (6 comments)
Back To TopEmpire States: What Did Miramax Ever Do For Us?
Posted on Friday January 29, 2010, 11:54 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 The scene: The Empire offices, Friday. Chris Hewitt is leading a news meeting (yes, we have news meetings).
Chris: So, Miramax has been closed down by Disney.
Helen O’Hara: We should do something on that. A celebration or something.
Chris: A celebration? Of Miramax? Are you mad? What have they ever given us?
Pause.
Ali Plumb: [meekly] Quentin Tarantino?
Chris: What?
Ali: Quentin Tarantino?
Chris: Oh yeah, Quentin Tarantino. After all, Harvey and Bob Weinstein were the guys who took a chance on him with Reservoir Dogs, and then partnered with him throughout his illustrious career. You could make a case that Miramax is the House That Quentin Built, so yeah, they did give us that.
Phil de Semlyen: And they introduced world cinema to a wider audience.
Helen: Oh yeah, world cinema, Chris. Rememb... Continue reading... Comment Now (5 comments)
Back To TopOff The Wire: He’s Back, He’s Bad, He’s Black, He’s Mad
Posted on Thursday January 28, 2010, 12:13 by Chris Hewitt in Off The Wire
 For my money, Shane Black may just be the best commercial screenwriter in Hollywood. From the first two Lethal Weapons through to The Monster Squad to The Long Kiss Goodnight, The Last Boy Scout and his wonderful directorial debut, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, nobody else in Hollywood – not even Tarantino – boasts Black's knack for tweaking genre tropes with an ear for tough-guy dialogue worthy of Chandler, Ellroy, Leonard.
So, naturally, I’m delighted by the news that he’s set to reteam with Mel Gibson on the spy thriller, Cold Warrior. And so should you. In case you need some persuasion, here are ten lines of dialogue that will make you glad that Black is back…
1. “Touch me again, and I’ll kill ya.”
Bruce Willis warns Kim Coates’ slap-happy henchman of the consequences of violating his personal bubble in The Last Boy Scout. It’s a laconic threat worthy of Bob Mitc... Continue reading... Comment Now (18 comments)
Back To TopEmpire States: Happy Birthday, Upside-downland! The greatest inverted moments in movie history
Posted on Tuesday January 26, 2010, 14:17 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 Strewth! It’s Australia Day! And so, to celebrate yet another birthday for our cousins Down Under, we’ve come up with, erm, a selection of the greatest upside down moments in movie history. Um, because Australia’s upside down, you see.
Batman
How unhinged is Michael Keaton’s Bruce Wayne? The answer, as seen in this brief scene where Kim Basinger’s Vicki Vale wakes up to find Master Wayne sleeping upside down like a bat, is “very”. It’s a cute little clue to his identity, an in-joke for audiences who already know that he’s the Batman and a sign to Vale that all may not be kosher with her billionaire boyfriend. Mind you, as a journalist, she should have her Pulitzer instantly revoked for not being able to work out that Batman and Bruce Wayne are one and the same. It’s all there, for pity’s sake!
Men In Black
Throughout the film, Will Smith’s Agent Jay has been told by Tommy Lee Jones... Continue reading... Comment Now (4 comments)
Back To TopEmpire States: What If... The Prestige Really Was Batman Vs Wolverine?
Posted on Monday January 18, 2010, 15:06 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 Beware all ye who enter here, for spoilers lurk within.
A conversation in the Empire office, a couple of hours ago.
Dan [Empire’s Features Editor, World of Warcraft nut and bargain basement Colin Farrell look-a-like]: Does anyone know anything about that new film, Frozen?
Helen [Empire’s Deputy Online Editor, cupcake fanatic and all-round office encyclopaedia]: Yeah, it’s about two guys trapped on a ski lift.
Me [Empire’s News Editor, Call Of Duty sacrificial lamb and general nitwit]: But one of the guys is Shawn Ashmore, who’s Iceman in the X-Men movies. So why doesn’t he just magic up an ice slide and escape?
Dan: It doesn’t… real life… [sigh]… you’re a cretin.
That’s as maybe… but it still sparked off a furiously geeky conversation, and a world of possibilities: what if actors who played superheroes could carry over their sup... Continue reading... Comment Now (28 comments)
Back To TopOff The Wire: Doh! Raimi: Why Sam Was Just Right For Spider-Man
Posted on Tuesday January 12, 2010, 10:00 by Chris Hewitt in Off The Wire
 So, farewell then, Sam Raimi. Gone from the Spider-Man franchise before he could make things right and atone, if that’s the word, for Spider-Man 3. That was a movie that got away from Raimi, by his own admission, and it would have been nice to see his take on Spider-Man, unfettered by studio interference and the too-many-cooks approach.
Alas, that now will never be the case. And while there are considerable benefits to a Raimi-free rebooting of the franchise – we probably won’t have to endure Aunt May prattling on endlessly, causing audiences to wonder why the guy who shot Uncle Ben couldn’t have pegged her too; while Kirsten Dunst was always a bit mopey and wan as Mary-Jane – the man stamped his personality and style all over the franchise with considerable brio.
Bugger it, it sounds like he’s dead. He’s not, of course, and in the year when he made his most purely enjoyable film in years (that would be Drag Me To Hell, i... Continue reading... Comment Now (8 comments)
Back To TopEmpire States: Who Should Be The New Host Of The BBC's Film 2010, 2011...?
Posted on Thursday January 7, 2010, 13:34 by Chris Hewitt in Empire States
 So Jonathan Ross has decided to leave the BBC. Which means that, when the next season of Film [Insert Year Here] comes back on our screens, there’ll be a different pair of hopefully pert buttocks in the chair that Ross has filled so well since Barry Norman retired.
But whose buttocks should they be? Here, we evaluate the runners and riders for the best job in film journalism.
Charlie Brooker
Who he? The Guardian’s brilliant, witty and terribly acerbic TV critic.
Pros: He’s something of a genius wordsmith, and he’s got lots of TV experience both in front of and behind the camera.
Cons: He’s the angriest man in the world, and wouldn’t like anything. ANYTHING. Might be too angry for Auntie Beeb.
James King
Who he? Radio 1’s resident film critic.
Pros: He’s got lots of experience, and has the common tou... Continue reading... Comment Now (79 comments)
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