This may be the geekiest thing I’ve ever said, but if I could have a free webcam link-up with anywhere in the world right now, I wouldn’t plump for the usual salubrious suspects (so, Rosario Dawson, you can breathe a sigh of relief now and go about your business), but instead I’d choose to be connected to the office of Kevin Feige, President of Production at Marvel Studios.
Why? Because, whenever he has his back turned, I’d be trying to sneak a peek at the documents on his desk. Because I’m guessing that somewhere there, amidst the scripts, the detritus and half-filled coffee mugs, there might well be a piece of paper with a bunch of names on it. The names of the actors who could well fill the shoes of The First Avenger: Captain America.
Let’s ignore that horrible title – as Olly Richards so correctly pointed out in his story the other day, most people will just call the forthcoming movie ‘Captain America’, the same way as they&rs...
I read with interest a lot of the reader comments about the new Incredible Hulk trailer. The main problem for those who didn't like it seems to be that the Hulk doesn't look real enough. It's a perfectly valid criticism – he doesn't always look utterly perfect and tangible – but it made me wonder if we've reached a point in cinema where we've lost the ability to suspend our disbelief. We are, after all, talking about a 10-foot tall green man, something you would be rather surprised to see standing in the queue at your local Tesco. Precisely how realistic can something entirely unrealistic be?
We never used to be so picky. If somebody watches the original King Kong or any of the works of Ray Harryhausen, you will never hear them complain about how the skeletons were a bit jerky or that the big ape's fur didn't blow realistically when he was climbing the Empire State Building (if they do complain, however, you should feel free to shoot them on the grounds of wrongness and philistini...
This is, perhaps, an odd thing for a film critic to admit, but sometimes I positively enjoy bad films. You know, the films with no pretensions to anything other than stupidity, the films that star bad actors or display ropey effects orjust don't do what they set out to do. I realise that Van Helsing, say, is hugely, horribly flawed, but there are Friday nights (following long weeks) when I'd rather watch Hugh Jackman run around after vampires like the star of a particularly violent Timotei ad than any number of worthy, accomplished, admirable award winners.
That said, there's a limit. When new critics start here at Empire, we're often sent to review the worst of the worst, and as reviews editor sometimes I take a bullet myself instead of sacrificing one of my minions. And sometimes I suffer a fit of the head staggers and think something like, "I know! I'll watch Blonde and Blonder tonight!" So here's a rundown of the films so bad they're awful, the ones that aren't fun on any level,...
I’m annoyed. This in itself is hardly an unusual occurrence but I feel the need to tell you about it all the same. I’m annoyed about Blu-rays, and no, it’s not because I was foolish enough to buy an HD-DVD Player only for it plummet into obsolescence the moment it left the box (Chris and Nick did, though). It's not because Blu-rays are in some way a bad format either. No, what really makes me want to take a bat to someone’s nethers is the prospect of having to replace my entire collection of shiny new DVDs with shinier newer Blu-ray discs when I’ve only just finished swapping out the last of my VHS tapes. Talk about moving the goalposts.
Back in 1997, I was one of the early DVD adopters. There were precisely zero Region 2 DVDs available to buy in this country, but I went and forked out £600 for a Panasonic player (the only one available) with a multi-region chip hard-wired in. Armed with this cutting-edge piece of kit, I set about importing films from the ...
Given that the most popular shows on TV these days often have a sci-fi or fantasy bent (Lost, Heroes, Doctor Who, Life on Mars) it's entirely possible for innocent viewers who don't know their Captain Picard from their Captain Birdseye to accidentally slip into geekdom. One minute you're innocently oggling David Tennant / Evangeline Lily, next minute you're considering the mechanics of time travel and wondering why Klingons suddenly developed bumpy foreheads between the original series of Star Trek and the Next Generation.
But worry not, help is at hand! Using our simple check list below, you can assess whether or not you have already crossed the line, and find out if there's still time to get back to normality by mainlining episodes of Gossip Girl.
Time to take THE QUIZ!
1. Take one point for each of the following that mean anything to you (in a sci-fi sense): BSG, DS9, NCC-1701, Flight 815, Ood, KJM 212K, the Minbari, Seven of Nine, Number Six, Reavers, Ziggy, Primatech Paper.
Of all the many magnificent set-pieces in the Indiana Jones series to date, my personal favourite is the horse/truck/car/motorcycle-and-sidecart chase in the third act of Raiders. It’s heartpounding class all the way, from Indy’s ‘screw the odds’ gallop down a sheer slope towards the Nazi convoy transporting the Ark, to his cheeky grin as he twists the hijacked truck’s steering wheel and nudges the motorbike off a cliff.
But amid all the dusty mayhem and genius gags — check out the panicked fruit-picker falling onto the windscreen — there’s one element of the sequence that stands out. I’m talking about the daredevilry of one particular German officer, and how damn close he gets to despatching our hero for good.
The Nazi, more genial-looking than your average movie henchvillain, sits in the rear of the truck with the rest of his unit, all of them charged with guarding the crated Ark at any cost. He appears to be the leader, judging...
Why is everyone still picking on Tom Cruise? OK, jumping on a sofa to declare your love for someone is weird. And, yes, he is part of a religion that sounds, to some of us, like it may use Star Trek fan fiction as its holy scripture. But I don’t care about any celebrity’s religious beliefs. The thing is, Cruise has done nothing bad to anyone and, most importantly, continues to make very good movies and be very good in them. So why does he continue to be entertainment blog whipping-boy number one?
I ask the question because, after a couple of years of mild snarking at Cruise’s expense, things seem to be turning vitriolic. A recent article by Roger Friedman on the FOX News website (I hate to encourage eyes to such bilge, but you can read it here) tears the actor apart without restraint or any pretence at objectivity, saying that his next film Valkyrie is destined for ridicule – based chie...
Take a look at the new trailer for Meet Dave, go on, it’s right here. Seen it? Good, now how many of you laughed? Be honest. Nobody? Thought so!
Remember when Eddie Murphy used to be funny? I know it was long ago, but what great days they were. Trading Places, Coming To America, 48 Hrs, Beverly Hills Cop - time was that his fast-talking, foul-mouthed schtick would have us open mouthed in awe. But now… well nothing.
Once a cutting-edge comedian who gleefully stomped on the face of good taste and punctuated every sentence with a vitriol-fuelled “Fuck you” (see his brilliant stand-up gigs Delirious and Raw), Murphy’s ignoble fall from gigglesome grace is all down to his predilection for making box office friendly family movies – the money-spinning elephant graveyard where formerly funny folk go to die on their asses.
Last week a US court ruled that the heirs of Superman co-creator Jerry Seigel have the right to claim a share of the copyright in the character (read the full story here), putting the cat well and truly among the Warner Bros pigeons. Will this put the final nail in the coffin of a Superman Returns sequel? And more importantly, will it signal the end of Superman onscreen at all?
Here's the technical bit. The judgment itself is pretty complicated, and likely to be the subject of an appeal by Time Warner, the parent company of both Warner Bros and DC Comics, but it does say that Seigel's family should share in proceeds from the comics since 1999 - leaving open the question of whether they should also share in the profits from Superman Returns. In 2013, Joe Shuster's heirs will be able to bring the same case, re...
There are many great things you can do with Lego: build spaceships; model a fortress for your hamster; stick pieces up your nose so that your mum has to take you to the hospital and then, again, inform you that you’re now 28 and it’s just not cute anymore. But, the best thing you can do with them, if you have a lot of time on your hands, is make movies.
The finest example I've seen recently of this particular micro-movie phenomenon is the Dark Knight trailer entirely constructed from themed plastic. You've probably seen it before, but it's worth watching again below.
This little bit of toy genius lead me on a time-wasting quest for the best Lego movies on the i...
