Ladies and gentlemen, brace yourselves – you're about to enter what Empire casually calls "The house of topless women and flying daggers" with this exclusive red band trailer of 3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy.
It is, without a shadow of a doubt, totally not suitable for work, and probably not suitable for anyone who's morbidly afraid of curved blades winging their way into people's throats and/or Chinese ladies jiggling about provocatively with their clothes off.
Finally hitting Blighty's cinematic shoreline after its initial release (ahem) in Asia – where it's now hauled in over HK$40 million in Hong Kong alone, beating both Titanic and Avatar – it's as full of the 3D gimmicks and soft-lit naked flesh as you'd expect from a movie that calls itself "a 3D erotic costume drama".
We won't, er, spoil the plot for you, but know this: it involves people having sex, and other people fighting other people, then, presumably, having sex. And it's in 3D. Ticks all the boxes, this movie does.
And again, we can't remind you enough about this one -- the following trailer contains about as much naked flesh and general softcore shaggery as you could ever expect from a trailer just one and a bit minutes long. Ye have been warned...
All 127 minutes of 3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy will be hitting your local Odeon come September 2.